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Golfing is a fun game. Whether you’re a scratch golfer or someone who is just starting out, it can be fun to play as long as you’re not too concerned with the score. You and your buddies are using Saturday and to escape the wives, girlfriends, and the stress of the work week. Can’t think of a better way to spend my weekends. However, sometimes your playing partners have some tendencies that suddenly make that Saturday shopping trip to Bed, Bath, and Beyond seem like a good idea. Some playing partners just aren’t getting invites.
Here are the seven worst golfing partners you don’t want to play with.
The Angry Golfer
I was a victim of the angry golfer a few weeks ago while playing at The Tribute in Dallas a few weekends ago. I started a run of five straight pars on number nine. On 13, I sunk a nice little 25 footer to save for par. Instead of getting a “nice putt” from my partner, he threw his putter in disgust and said, “Merry Christmas.” His mood didn’t change after I pumped one right down the middle on 14 and he topped one. I let his mood bring me down and my focus was shot. I double-bogeyed out because I was rushing to get the round over with.
Playing with an angry golfer is like playing with a ticking time bomb. If things aren’t going their way, you never know what’s going to happen. Will clubs be snapped? Will the round turn into golf club javelin? There is a lot of uncertainty with the angry golfer.
The Tip Guy
You just shanked one into the woods and are trying to shake off the yips around the green. Don’t worry, here comes your resident PGA Pro buddy. He’s read a lot of books so he knows what he’s talking about. After every bad shot, he’s there to give you some little tip or drill to fix your issues. Listen, no one is on the course to get a damn lesson. If they wanted a lesson, they’d pay for a lesson. Most people just want to know they made a bad shot without having to here Johnny Club Pro offer up his advice on how to make you better every hole.
Unlimited Mulligan Guy
These are the rules that I play: you get a breakfast ball off of number 1 tee and one mulligan for the rest of the 17 tee shots you have left. It keeps your group from taking 100 shots out of the rough on one hole. But yet, here’s unlimited mully guy who holds up the rest of the group from hitting because he HAS to hit a perfect shot. Once he does, he’ll mark himself down for a mulligan bogey and taunt you at the end of the round for beating you by a stroke even though he took four times as many swings as you did during the round.
The Ball Hunter
Hitting into the woods can be a blessing in disguise. Not because you’re in the woods and it’ll take you a lateral shot to get out, but because it gives you the chance to possibly find a good ball while looking for yours. Who doesn’t love a free ProV1 or Chrome Soft? That doesn’t mean that you should then spend the next five minutes just searching for free balls. The rule is you search for your ball and if a ball shows up, you can grab it. You can’t find your ball, then go searching.
The “I’m Usually Not This Bad” Guy
You get a sinking feeling when you get paired with anyone you don’t know. You don’t know if they’re good or terrible. So you ask them how they typically shoot. You’ll probably get an answer like “usually mid-80s, sometimes high 70s.” So you’re thinking that you have yourself a good partner who isn’t going to hold up the pace. That is, until he has four straight snowmen to start the round. “I’m usually not this bad,” is what he will say. Then he’ll spend the rest of his round explaining that he usually birdies this hole or can put it close on that hole. C’mon, dude. Just admit that you aren’t great. I won’t think different of you for it.
The Stroke Shaver
We’ve got one of these in our group. Love him though just because he’s a high energy guy you need in the group so he gets a pass. But if you have a guy who takes six shots to get to the green and three putts and tells you he got a six, it gets old quick. Yeah, it’s a little embarrassing taking nines every hole, but your crew will respect you admitting it.
Refusing To Pick Up Guy
If you’re already at double par by the time you get to the green, just pick up and save the group some time..
Respond
Harrison Lee
Harrison is a Content Manager at Grandex. When he's not working for the man, you can find him on the golf course or blowing his paycheck doubling down on red. LinkedIn profile
@HMontgomery_
#8: Judas…. That son of a bitch
Was wondering he kissed you on the cheek walking off 18….
“The Son of Man indeed goes, as it is written of him, but woe to that man by whom the Son of Man is betrayed. It would be better for that man if he had never been born (and ruin a perfectly good game of golf)”
Matthew 26:24
Best round of my life, too. And he has to go and kiss me on the cheek right there and then.
You can be a terrible golfer, but if you have a good attitude, mind the basic etiquette, and play fast, people will enjoy playing with you.
Cheating is fucking pathetic. Own your failures.
I warn people that I suck, but I suck quickly. This often leads to an odd moment of silence.
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What about your boss when he begs to get into the threesome? I golf to get away from my boss and talk mad shit about him with co-workers.
Great first sentence of the angry golfer portion. Feeling the need to correct someone’s mistakes even though it makes you a douche. PGP.
My buddies and I love golfing but we can’t seem to make it past the 7th tee box before we are blasting Biggie Smalls from our iPhones while we tee off
Why wait six holes?
Damn I really suck at golf. Always down for a round of drinking and heavy swearing though.
My group has implemented a complimentary double bogey rule to keep the pace of play up. When you get to double you pick it up no questions asked.
I’m pretty liberal with mulligans if there isn’t anyone behind you. But i ain’t gonna sign your score card if you do one or two every hole.
Honorary mention: the guy who gets on the golf gourse solely to get shit hammered. When you’re drinking bourbon out of a sports bottle between swings, time to find a new hobby.
Don’t mind that too much unless he 1) blows 2) plays slow or 3) gets too drunk to finish or drive home.