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The majority of guys are horrible at picking up signals from women. I have probably missed out on countless dates because the signals went right over my head. I know that women know how to flirt, but some moves just work better than others. For this reason, it’s necessary to power-rank the best of them.
1. Giving “The Eye”
Giving a guy “the eye” is the ultimate seduction pro move. It’s the perfect middle ground between being blatantly obvious and overly subtle. When a girl is actively trying to make eye contact with you and gives you a penetrating gaze like she’s trying to make your head explode, you very clearly have her attention. There are variations to “the eye” that can make it especially effective. There is the “eye fuck,” “the eye” followed by a smile and a quick turn away, or the longing gaze that screams, “Hey dumbass, get over here! Do you want me to do the walk of shame from your apartment in the morning or not?” Sixty percent of the time, it works every time.
2. The Intentionally Cute Giggle
Disclaimer: I’ll punish myself later for using the word “giggle,” don’t you worry.
When a girl is talking to a guy, he can recognize a courtesy laugh instantly, and an obvious courtesy laugh can make a guy flaccid for up to 24 hours (it’s solid science), which is counterproductive to the whole flirting thing. The cute giggle, if recognized as a form of a courtesy laugh, still lets the guy know you find him attractive. Plus, it’s surprisingly endearing. It’s a subtle way of letting him know he can still make a move if he minimizes the dumb jokes and stops saying stupid stuff. As a guy who goes over the top in speaking his mind, I can attest that I have extensive experience with the cute giggle, and it’s 100 percent effective.
3. The Hair Twirl
The hair twirl is the ultimate dating cliché but it’s also the most recognizable form of flirting. Paired with eye contact, it very clearly conveys the message, “You’re doing well so far, don’t say anything stupid and you just might get somewhere.” In many cases, the hair twirl is involuntary, making it a staple in the flirting game.
4. The Lip Bite
One of the more obvious and practiced techniques, the lip bite conveys the obvious message of “let’s get out of here right now.” It’s the universal nonverbal “mission accomplished” victory speech that might as well prompt fighter jets to fly low overhead. America.
5. The Cleavage Lean
Showing off the girls is the oldest trick in the book, but guys take that bait like Buckwheat and Porky chasing a dollar bill on a fishing line. It’s the same trick used by waitresses and female bartenders to get big, voluptuous tips, but it can also be used to effectively catch the attention of unsuspecting potential dates.
6. Touching Your Hair
There is nothing quite like a girl running her fingers through your hair to make you devolve into, basically, a pet dog. A big, dumb dog who enjoys getting petted. Normally, touching my hair is grounds for execution, but if she’s hot, she can somehow get away with it–as long as I get a treat afterward.
7. Touching Your Shirt
Whether she’s adjusting your tie, straightening your collar, or rubbing your chest to feel “how soft your shirt is,” the shirt touch is an underrated and powerful move. Women, am I right?
8. The Subconscious Lip Lick
She wants to kiss you, obviously. It’s a nice and subtle “accident” because if she wasn’t interested in you, she wouldn’t give a shit how dry her lips are.
9. The “Oops, I Dropped My Pen”
Now, I like a girl showing off her ass to me as much as the next guy, but this move is usually just a tease. Its only redeeming quality is the view, if she has a nice butt. Butt it’s just way too obvious–about as obvious as that embarrassingly horrible pun–and the only time it’s actually going to mean anything more than just for fun is if you are already dating. Then it means “touch my ass.”
10. The Blatant Wink
The wink is overly obvious and is key in the aggressive, drunk woman’s arsenal. It’s not what I would call a top-notch flirt move, but fuck it, it gets the message across..
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@5OClockShadow_
11. The Blowjob
12. The dick grab. No mistaking the intentions there.
This leads into the OTPHJ in the classy Irish Tavern you’re both sauced at.
Just text him “I do butt stuff.”
Men need to be ready for these situations; keeping the tool healthy is key. More men need to use a quality penis health crème (health professionals recommend Man1 Man Oil) to address penis odor, dry/flaky skin, penile blood flow, loss of sensation, etc.
She told me “13. Tongue punch my fart box.”
I had to change her pants from the wetness, after I said not a “snowballs chance in hell”, but you can suck my dick.
I had a girl “read my palm” on a date one time. Instant boner.
Sounds wild bro
Come on you guys it’s sarcasm.
Then he’s bad at it.