Stop Letting Stupid Shit Get The Best Of You


Every damn week there is something else that people get offended or upset about and I am really sick and tired of it. This week, people are bitching about Harriet Tubman on the $20 bill. I don’t understand the hoopla. It’s money. Other countries change their money all the time, no one carries paper money anymore, and Harriet Tubman was a badass. Hell, people used to use shells for money.

For the same reason people watch reality TV (to distract them from how boring their lives are), people love to hear themselves complain. We have people that are devastated by seeing “Trump2016,” and the other side mad about the $20 bill being changed. It’s two different sides of the same coin. Everyone is so salty and easily offended that I want to open up a torch and pitchfork company. Regardless of who gets mad at what, I’d make bank.

It’s always something. Whether it’s a moral panic, someone not making a cake for someone, or people taking a shit in whatever bathroom — who the hell cares? I’m a white, straight guy so I have no idea what someone going through whatever transformation to be what they want to be is going through, but I also just don’t care. It does not affect me in any way. These people are not rapists. They are just trying to take a shit in peace. Sure, there are instances that people will point to, but guess what? Planes crash sometimes and everyone still flies. A little empathy goes a long way.

Thankfully, we got a reprieve from the Jenners or Kardashians or whatever bullshit the media spews at us. Johnny Manziel did something stupid this week? You don’t say. That’s never happened before. We laugh, shake our heads, and think the dude is an animal or whatever. I’d love to have the talent, the ability, or the money Johnny Football has so I could stop paying 35% of my take home pay on student loans. I don’t feel bad for him one bit. He made his bed and now he’s sleeping in it.

The worst part about all of this? We do it to ourselves. We watch these people intently, hang on their every word, never mind that these people are train wrecks or made up characters by executives to behave a certain way. Later that day, the talking heads (not the defunct avant-garde New York band) talk about it. I still have PTSD from the Tebow times and LeBron’s team announcement.

If it’s not some stupid celebrity, it’s about the Constitutionality of things all the time even though the guy who wrote the Constitution said we should change it every 19 years. Nothing makes me more aggravated when people say “the Founding Fathers would do X” because of this. Our Founding Fathers had flaws just like everyone else. It’s all about cultural context and holding someone’s morality, school of thought or circumstance to the fire of what some dudes that wore powdered wigs 250 years ago is plain dumb. There is no doubt our Founding Fathers were some of the most educated minds of their time but times change, people change, and situations change. Our country looks a whole lot different than it did in 1776.

Each week, we have idiots on both sides, lining up to complain about guns. I own seven guns, including three that would be considered “assault weapons,” but I don’t think every Jethro and Bubba should get one because “our right to bear arms” was enacted when it took them 20-30 seconds to reload a round ball into a musket to stand in a line and shoot at some Redcoats. I took two courses, one on gun safety and the other on marksmanship, because I believe in knowing what I’m doing and that just because someone can do something doesn’t mean they should.

We as a society would be a lot more productive if worried about ourselves. We’re concerned with “other” people because they don’t think like us and it makes it easy to dismiss anything they have to say. We as a country divide ourselves and blame everyone else but ourselves. Our allegiances to some political party, certain ideology or whatever drive a stake through our collective. It’s done so you won’t think or ask questions but take things at face value without looking around to see what’s out there.

The rise in social media, while having many benefits, has given any idiot, yours truly included, a medium to say whatever. Stop giving a shit what Bieber or Kanye or whoever say because those people don’t give a shit about the common person. Learn to wade through the bullshit, be kind to others, practice empathy, and make a difference in your community because that’s what really matters. I know a lot of us, myself included, get fired up about stupid shit, caught up in celebrity stupidity or let sensationalized media knock you off our gait. In the end, we’re all members of the same species. If you’ve ever seen “A Bronx Tale” you’ll know this quote I’m leaving with you.

Sonny: Mickey Mantle? Is that what you’re upset about? Mickey Mantle makes $100,000 a year. How much does your father make? You don’t know? Well, see if your father can’t pay the rent, go ask Mickey Mantle and see what he tells you. Mickey Mantle don’t care about you, so why should you care about him? Nobody cares.

Image via Shutterstock

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I specialize in damage control, being the drunkest at any and all functions and social assassination. Always appreciate a strong gif game. Follow me on Twitter. Sometimes I put up cool stuff about golfing at the local dirt tracks.

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