Some Norwegian wild man has just been dropping mad deuces on one unlucky course in Norway.
Per Golf News Net:
Stavanger Golf Club has been dealing with the mystery pooper since 2005, and the club’s staff is convinced a man is behind the fecal graffiti for a simple reason.
“We know it is a man because the poos are too massive to be from a woman,” said groundskeeper Kenneth Tennfjord, who added that the man in question often leaves toilet paper to go along with the turds, according to the Rogalands Avis paper.
The person in question only poops in the cups on weekdays, never showing up on weekends.
When I’m looking for a place to poop, I’m looking for three things: peace, quiet, and toilet paper. This guy hit on all three, so I can’t help but respect him. He’s even bringing his own toilet paper. I know someone that continually poops on the golf course mid-round only to wipe with one of the rags attached to the ball washer before disposing of it in the woods, so all of the sudden this Scandinavian dude isn’t looking so savage, is he?
I’d condemn this dude for what’s doing, but I mean, come on. Homie has been doing it for ten years and this golf course still can’t find him? It’s called a Crittercam, guys. It’s not like he’s even doing this on random tee boxes or in the middle of the fairway — he’s doing it inside the holes so there’s literally only eighteen possibilities. Unless he’s littering the practice green with poops too, but that’d just be downright cocky.
Please forward any leads on this suspect to firstname.lastname@example.org so I can get a hold of this guy and learn everything about him. Until then, I’m just going to keep immersing myself in Norwegian culture by way of Emilie Nereng, my new Sunday Scaries muse. .
[via Golf News Net]
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