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J-Bone here. A few months ago, I went up to Chicago before it was cool (and by that I mean before Socktoberfest AKA Here Come Dem Bean Touchin’ Boyz AKA The “Please Dear God Don’t Let Me Be The One Rooming With Micah” Trip) to make some #content with my brother Jeff.
Cube Jeff and I accomplished a lot up there, including shooting a bunch of social media videos with Duda and working on what became the universe’s #1 top-rated podcast, The Borislow Zone. Sadly I had to leave Chi-Town after one short week on account of my good friend Dillon telling me, “Put two weeks between our trips to give time for your stank to dissipate; you’re a disgusting oaf who reeks of five pounds of steer manure, the smell of which someone attempted to mask with a quarter-full Glade PlugIn.” But you KNOW I didn’t bid deuces to the city of six-pointed stars before shooting my magnum opus there. Shouts to my co-star Ryan.
Because you either know this guy or are this guy and there’s no third option.
Not too sure I appreciate that caption you hit me with, Dave. While yes, I have acted similarly to this while hitting clinks out on the links, you and I both know that side of me only comes out when Micah‘s in the group. Speaking of Micah, here are Five Fast Facts™ about the golf game of one Micah Weiner:
1. Micah is a deadeye with the flatstick, but only from outside 4 feet. I once witnessed him three-putt from three feet out.
2. Regardless of whether or not children are around, Micah does a Tiger fist pump and yells “P-P-P-PAR PUSSY!” (sometimes to no one in particular, oftentimes to me) after he sinks a par putt.
3. Micah slices the ball so hard that if he were to play in a tournament, the marshal would have to do three separate flight direction signals to accurately reflect his shot shape.
4. Micah uses one of those lame-ass chipper clubs.
5. Micah is the #BranskyGawd. You don’t know what that means, but he does — and it really upsets him. Feel free to use that one on him.
What are some of the most sorry moves you’ve seen while out on the course? Let your boy know in the comments.
BABABOOEY!!!.
Oh, and also check out The Borislow Zone on Grandex Labs. It’s only 17:38 (because #FettyLife), so don’t try and tell me you don’t have time for it.
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Jared Borislow
Jared Borislow (@JaredBorislow) is a Senior Editor for Grandex Inc and the supreme leader of the Bone Zone.
@jaredborislow
@jaredborislow
I kept waiting for the “You know what would really help your game?” comment. So no, this isn’t the worst partner ever. But he will never be considered a good one either.
Someone who does that isn’t a golf partner, but rather a golf enemy. Very subtle yet massive difference.
Or “you should keep your head/shoulders/hips down/locked/loose when you’re swinging/chipping/putting/jacking it.” But seriously this video should come with a trigger warning.
*Unstraps golf bag*
The fact Micah uses a chipper is not shocking to anyone in the least.
Come on, neutral or turning the key off is a classic.
I always like to give awards out at the end of a round.
Biggest Slicer Award: Jared
Biggest Hooker Award: @micahwiener ‘s mother
Your brother sounds like funkhouser
That’s not my brother; that’s ol’ Ryan.
Also, once put a snake in my buddy’s cart. That was gold.
That’s not cool. Fuck snakes