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Ah, The Monday Blues, the first cousin of the Sunday Scaries. Merriam-Webster defines them as, “a Monday that is depressing or trying especially because of the return to work and routine after a weekend.” I had them this morning until Ella Henderson’s “Ghost” came on during my commute, thereby turning my entire day around.
But as it turns out, pretty much everyone in the workforce gets them whether you’re from Canada or Florida. Prime examples? These people are just trolling the internet looking for some strange by way of Craigslist’s Casual Encounters.
Take, for instance, this dude from Toronto.
MONDAY BLUES: DO WE HAVE THE SAME MINDSET? (Toronto / GTA)
I’m a good looking guy in my thirties who doesn’t go out a lot and am single… So there is a void that needs filled as its been quite some time. Are you in the same boat? Do you need someone to show you attention and explore your beautifulness? You do miss kissing a man? Having him touch and rub you gentle? Reply back, let’s get together and show each other what we’ve been missing. Are you free to chill today or tonight? Speed the process up by sending a pic in your reply and show you’re not spam, please “monday” in the subject. I’m open to any age or race.
I mean, this is a pretty straight-forward request for a little early-week ass, but I respect it nonetheless. He’s not trying to reinvent the wheel here, just touch and gently rub someone who’s looking to chill today or tonight. Maybe he’s workin’ from home today or is just taking a long lunch. I guess there’s only one way to find out, and that’s by emailing him with “Monday” in the subject line.
Another guy, who claims to be an athletic 35-year-old from the Tampa Bay, Florida area is just strugglin’ today.
Bored guy with the Monday blues – m4w (Largo)
I’m a tall, white, educated guy looking for some adult fun today. I am off work today and need some zing today. I love all types of womeb. Hit me up and I can tell you more. I am very real.
It’s a pretty aggressive claim to call yourself “educated” only to misspell “women” just a few sentences later. Thankfully, he’s “very real” and down for some adult fun in the form of nookie.
Monday Blues! (office)
height : 5’10” (177cm) ethnicity : white status : single
age: 28
Hi city. The week just started. Anyone want to chat and help a cute guy through another day at the office?
Real talk though. Is this dude just looking to Gchat with someone? Because my gchat game is strong as hell. I ain’t cyberin’ with him though. Sorry, man.
As the world’s foremost authority on the Sunday Scaries, the Monday blues are nothing foreign to me. But I’m just going to cure mine tonight with a strong pour of Pinot and a miniature Hulu Happy Endings marathon before taking down a couple Zzquil and getting a solid 9 hours of sleep. To each their own. .
Image via Unsplash
Respond
Will
Will (Twitter / Instagram) is the host of The Sunday Scaries Podcast.
@willdefries
@willdefries
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will@grandex.co
Whatever happened to slamming Zima’s with the fellas while watching Full House re-runs to try and figure out where we went wrong?
“Hi city. The week just started. Anyone want to chat and help a cute guy through another day at the office?”
“Real talk though. Is this chick just looking to Gchat with someone? Because my gchat game is strong as hell. Ain’t single though, so no cybering on this end of things. Sorry.”
Uhhhh… pretty sure that is a dude, unless I am missing something.
Haha, fixed it right as I posted. nice
Yeah, I misread it first time around, saw no one had commented, sighed relief, only to see your comment and hate myself.
Don’t know if you’ve seen this or not:
http://elitedaily.com/wellness/why-you-get-anxious-sunday-nights/1349040/
Coincidence? Doubtful.
Wow, after reading that, Will, you may want to actually consider trying to trademark “Sunday Scaries.”
Early-week ass TM