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Dear Big Dill,
Per usual, LTFT. My friends and I (all around 20 years old) have run into a bit of a problem this summer. One by one we came back from college until the whole squad was finally reunited. We went through the usual routine of getting drunk with each other and hanging out in basements. Most of the girls we used to hang with either found boyfriends in college, or presumably felt too old to get drunk in a basement. Although we didn’t want to admit it, something felt off. This seemed to satisfy our high school needs but we suddenly all wanted more from our weekend nights. Finally one night, one of the squad members attacked the elephant in the room claiming that we were “washed up”.
At first everyone was angry at him, but then we came to the realization that he may be right. Now obviously we aren’t too washed up, considering we are all still in college, but washed up in the sense that our best days are behind us (or at least until we all turn 21). We aren’t in high school anymore and as fun as getting drunk in basements with your boys is, we need something to spice it up. We are all a year or two away from being able to go to bars and most of the guys in our group don’t have fakes. I hope your response will help any other groups of 18, 19, or 20 year old guys in the same position. Any suggestions as to how we should spend the rest of this summer and all of next?
Dude, what? You’re not even of legal age to consume alcohol and you’re talking to my old ass about being washed up? What’s the matter with you? Like you can’t even get into bars yet and you’re acting like it’s time to fill your closet with Tommy Bahama and join a country club and spend your weekends going to little league games and shit. Pull it together, man.
Maybe stop hanging out in basements? Are you still hiding beers from your parents or something? I don’t get it. Go to the lake or something. Surely someone you know has a pool? Play golf maybe? Why am I even fielding this question?
Do you have any personal rules for dropping the L-bomb on a significant other? I’ve been dating my girlfriend for a solid 6 months now. Her birthday is next month and she has been dropping hints that what she wants for said birthday is something that cannot be purchased. I am pretty sure ole girl wants me to drop the L-bomb.
I guess my personal hang-up on this is that I’ve never dropped the love word on a girlfriend in the past. I’ve got strong feelings for the lady, but still feel like this is too soon. Am I a psycho or should I know if it’s love or not 7 months deep?
I’ve always been a fan of calling your girlfriend “ole girl.”
The only rule I guess I have about dropping the L-bomb is only say if it’s actually true. Don’t say it too early because you feel like you’re supposed to, or you feel that “it’s time.” Or if you feel it’s an obligated return volley. That’s a disservice to each of you. Wait it out and get it right.
I was the first one married in my friend group last October and I am now unexpectedly having identical twin bros before our first wedding anniversary. PSA to everyone: the pill really isn’t 100% effective, plan accordingly.
As the wise grey beard of the group (#beardgame is looking scrong tho), what are your Top 5 parenting tips for your boy that you’ve learned with the homie?
Side note: Real messed up your narc neighbor is hating on the young kings living their best life at the crib. Maybe consider planting some drugs in her house/car and calling the cops on her for a change. If you need some more crime tips, get at me.
Other side note: any type of big cat is rippin that jug and will have you leakin everywhere. I speak for all of #ToucherNation in saying that’s a risk not worth taking my guy.
Absolutely wild that your wife got pregnant with twins while on the pill. You have super sperm, sir. Wanted none, got two. Wow. Hey, thank you for putting some respect on my beard. It’s really coming into its own and I’m thankful people are finally acknowledging that it looks absolutely amazing.
I don’t have any parenting tips that you can’t find in a million other articles available on the internet, but here’s a good one: The things they take interest in, let them run with them.
Tiny versions of yourself are awesome in so many ways. Oh, and this is very cliché, but they grow up very fast so enjoy them all the time. One minute they’re crawling for the first time and the next they’re telling you it’s dangerous to be on your phone while driving (The Homie, three years old, said this to me last week).
P.S. It would be very easy to take out a cheetah, but don’t worry — I don’t have any fights set up.
I have a pretty straightforward question – is it a weird move to give a wedding gift that’s not from the registry?
A good friend of mine is getting married this summer and it’ll be first non-family wedding I’m going to. The registry is mostly standard household items (they already live together) and it’s pretty clear his fiance picked them all out. Not a knock on her or anything – she’s great and we’ve become friends – but I feel like my friend and I are close enough that showing up with some muffin trays or pillow cases just seems impersonal. Would it be weird to give one thing from the registry and then something else more aimed at my buddy? Or just abandon the registry and think of something on my own? Curious what everyone thinks.
Definitely not a weird move. In fact, the closer the friend you are, the less you’re expected to bring a gift from the registry. It’s still cool if you do, of course, but an “I know the real Adam” gift is always a good move.
Let the aunt from out of state buy the muffin trays.
My wife of 2+ years just told me a couple days ago she’s pregnant. Your boy is pumped. Just hype me up, or warn me on what not to do, idk. It really hasn’t completely hit me yet. Thanks homie.
Hearing the news I was going to be a dad was easily one of the most amazing moments of my life.
I told the story on Touching Base, but Dallas filmed my reaction as she told me, uploaded the video to YouTube, forgot to set it to private, then it went viral unbeknownst to us. One day I might share the video.
This is about you, though. CONGRATS. Your life is about to change, sir. Each day gets easier and better. They start to get personalities and it gets more fun. It’s amazing and mind blowing, really. Wow, I really made this kid? is a recurring thought of mine.
For more advice on what to do, hit up The DadGum Podcast on Grandex Labs.
I’ll try to keep this short. I took an obscure field of engineering in University, and wasn’t able to find any work in cities, but I managed to find a job in the field in South America. Because of the remoteness of where I work, I work 3.5 straight weeks of 12-14 hour work days, then I get about 3 weeks off where my company flies me anywhere I want. Being 24 and debt/girlfriend free, I take full advantage of this policy and travel solo as much as I can, making friends from all over in hostels and stuff like that. While I really love my job and the travelling, the long hours and going months on end without seeing any friends or family has really ground me down over the past year and a half I’ve been working there.
A few days ago I got a job offer to work in an office in downtown Montreal, which is hands down the dopest city in Canada, plus I have tons of friends and family there. The job is pretty much the same as what I would be doing if I stayed at my current company. I’ve asked all my friends and family what I should do, and I know they’re biased and said move to Montreal. So now I’m coming to you, since I have never met you in my life, asking whether I’m crazy for throwing away a lifestyle many of the readers would kill for or if I’m justified in wanting a more normal yuppie lifestyle.
TLDR- would you rather travel the world by yourself through your twenties or party it up with your friends
Thanks and God bless
As cool as it is that your company flies you anywhere you want so frequently, I imagine that schedule would get really tough after a while. Three and a half weeks straight of 12 to 14 hour days is absolutely grueling. And it sounds like you’re traveling alone for much of this? Man, I don’t know.
I can understand how this setup would be a great experience for a while, but after traveling around for a year and a half and knocking out my bucket list items, I’d be ready for a more traditional work schedule I think.
I’d take the job in Montreal if I were you..
The more questions I receive, the better this series is going to be, so send me your Mailbag questions to [email protected] and please put “Mailbag” in the subject line.