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Dating is hard. Everything about it. But it’s supposed to be hard! If it wasn’t hard then everyone would do it. The hard is what makes it great.
It’s not easy asking an 11/10 Mount Saint Helens burning magma level smoke stack on a date. It’s not easy agreeing to meet up with some guy you met on the internet when you know in all likelihood all he wants to do is shove himself inside of you. It’s not easy juggling three women at once like some sort of dating circus performance artist, and it’s not easy beating up an ER nurse with a stiletto when you walk in on your man taking his schmeckle to pay dirt with her.
Men and women alike have to worry about more moving parts than the head of NASA, and now you can add dining and dashing to the list of fifty trillion things that could go wrong on a first date. Some dude in LA is going out with women, ordering outrageous meals, then deucing out mid-meal, belly and wallet full, his dates left to foot the bill.
Per Refinery29:
He’s handsome, he’s a voracious eater, and he has been taking women on dates, where he ghosts them mid-meal. And he leaves them with the bill. A notorious serial dine-and-dasher in the greater Los Angeles area has struck again, after making headlines last summer for committing the same offense.
One woman told CBS Los Angeles that his name is Paul Gonzales while another, who matched with him on Bumble, says he identified as Dave Gonzales. Both women were left with the bill for the meal after he fled from the date.
Gonzales meets women online, initiates dates in varied locations from Pasadena to Long Beach, and is “complimentary” and “chatty” in person. He isn’t shy about ordering a large amount of food — one woman said he ordered a glass of pinot, a Caesar salad with a side of shrimp, a steak and a baked potato — and when questioned, he’s reportedly said he’s a bodybuilder, according to an account in US Weekly. After scarfing down his meal, he makes an excuse to step away for a bit. Then he’s never heard from again.
Is this a dick move? Hellllll yeah. There’s a special circle of hell reserved for assholes like this. You can’t just con the women of LA out of a few Benjamins and get away with it. So he’ll get his. On this side or the other.
But what I want to address is the title of the article this news clip is taken from. The title is “Why is this guy dine & dashing on his dates?” There have been dumber headlines, and there will continue to be, but if you’re legitimately befuddled by this man’s behavior than you need a check with reality. Why is this man dining and dashing on his dates? Because he’s hungry AF, he – like the rest of us – is probably is broke AF, and he’s got a certain set of skills to better his situation (namely, his charm and good looks).
I would venture that this dude might actually be homeless, but since he’s on Bumble and ordering Pinot Noir rather than asking the server at Catch for their finest premium malt beverage, I’m guessing he’s got a roof, albeit one that’s wayyyyy overpriced and is forcing him to choose between housing/internet/phone or food. So, not homeless; he’s just got no money to pay for food.
I do have a hunch that he’s married. He doesn’t try to ever have sex with these women, he’s overly complimentary and chatty, he’s ordering fucking salad: this guy’s spent more time with women than just the first 75% of several first dates. There’s too much Pavlovian Conditioning in his behavior to suggest he’s single.
Final verdict? Why is this guy dining and dashing on his dates? Because he’s a broke married dude who just wants to get away from his wife for a little bit and eat at upscale restaurants with LA’s most eligible bachelorettes once in a while. And you know what? I said he’s an asshole, and he is. But I also think this is genius. Get away from your wife for a bit and also eat a free* steak? Wish I was that smart, to be honest.
*It’s always free if you never actually see the bill. That’s science..
Image via Shutterstock
[via Refinery29]
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Boston Max
Spending my retirement fund at Trader Joe's and trying to remember to check my mailbox semi-regularly
@BostonMaxG
@boston_maxg
Doing this would first require getting a date – PGP
Crashed and burned, huh Mav?
Looks like she’s lost that lovin’ feeling.
Hey that’s my line
Something like that
I’m confused as to why a glass of wine, a salad, shrimp, a steak, and a potato is considered “a large amount of food”. I get it’s pricey but that sounds like a hearty weekend meal to me.
Maybe that says more about my eating habits though. PGP
Thought the same. Sounds like Tuesday to me.
That makes 3 of us. Way too normal of a meal. Trying to make it seem like he ordered truffled caviar and kobe beef
Kobe beef with Shaq top 5 all time tho
I’m guessing it was one of those places where everything is a la carte, the salad is enough to feed a family of four and the baked potato costs $12.
That sucks, but hard to imagine any of these girls are in the red when it comes to total payment for bumble dinners.
I mean this guy is very much my hero, too. He’s fighting back to try and even the score, but unfortunately Tom Brady himself couldn’t dig me out of the hole I’ve created for myself by paying for all the hundreds (tens) of dates I go on.
my first ever online date, the guy basically forced me to pay the bill, didn’t even offer to pay for the tip, and then he didn’t even say thank you. AT LEAST SAY THANKS, MAN.
Gotta hear both sides.
he’s also the one who called black people “those people” and said that learning disabilities didn’t exist and kids are just lazy LOL
so he definitely wasn’t a winner.
Guy could be on to something here.
Yeah, if I was doing this I’d be ordering appetizers, a large bone in ribeye, dessert, and several top shelf cocktails before ducking out. What an amateur.
I hate this guy but also kind of admire his gutsy take on life. I’m as confused as all the girls I ghosted back in college (dick move, but the past is what it is and acceptance is a form of recovery).
Tru Life: I Ghost(?)
I’m not sure what to think about the stock photo girl. Keep getting stuck at the “May I speak to your manager” haircut and am confused.
He’s a bodybuilder on a budget. Those are free gains
Nothing has blurred the lines between fucked up and genius more than this has.
I have a friend who goes on bumble dates with rich finance guys just for the expensive (free for her) meals and I can’t tell if I hate or respect her for it