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Do you remember when you used to go to the fair as a kid and there was always a “house of mirrors”? It was pretty much the lamest “ride” in the whole place, but it was a decent time killer, so your parents made you go in anyway. You would wander through the maze of mirrors, trying to find your way out, and all of them reflected your image just a little bit differently. The curves in the glass made you short and fat, tall and skinny, or just weird looking. Being short and fat in real life, I always found myself attracted to the one that made me look taller and skinnier, and I would stand there imagining the possibilities of a taller, thinner me.
While I’ve long-since accepted I’m never going to be taller (5’2 for life), I am skinnier. Despite the mocking comments about how slow my weight loss has been since I started writing this weekly column (love you guys), I have lost close to 90 pounds over the last year. But the interesting thing is that I don’t see it when I look in the mirror. It’s like all of the mirrors I encounter are the concave ones from that house of mirrors that make me look short and fat, which obviously isn’t possible (right? Is the universe fucking with me?). When I look in the mirror, I still see the 90 pounds ago me, the one wore pants five sizes bigger than the ones I do now.
So, what is it that prevents someone who has lost a bunch of weight from seeing it in the mirror? Why are our brains (and our eyesight) unable to catch up to the new reality of our body? Sure, it’s harder to notice weight loss when you look at yourself every day, but one would think a significant weight loss would still be recognizable in the mirror. But it turns out there is some actual science to why you can’t see the difference in the mirror.
An article entitled “Phantom Fat” May Linger After Weight Loss explores the question of why we may not see our weight loss in the mirror. Elayne Daniels, a psychologist who specializes in body-image issues, says, “People who were formerly overweight often still carry that internal image, perception, with them. They literally feel as if they’re in a large body still. Body image is a lot harder to change than the actual physical body is,” also noting that this may be partially true for those who were overweight for years and lost a lot of weight quickly. So that likely explains why I immediately head toward the plus size section of any store, even though I’m no where near an extend size anymore. Adrienne Ressler, a body-image specialist, adds “You have to look at retraining your brain and understanding that you have been reinforcing this negative image for probably a long time.” Yep, for pretty much my whole life, Ms. Ressler.
But while there’s plenty of information out there on how to “retrain our brain” to lose weight, there’s not much on how to do it so that we can recognize our new bodies in the mirror. But Ressler says, “We need to learn to appreciate our bodies. If we could all look in the mirror and say, ‘Hello, Gorgeous!’ I just think the world would be a better place for women.”
Maybe I’ll just start there..
Starting weight to Lose: 30 pounds
Week 1 Results: – 1.1 pounds
Week 2 Results: – 2.1 pounds
Week 3 Results: +0.4 pounds
Week 4 Results: – 0.2 pounds
Week 5 Results: – 0.2 pounds
Week 6 Results: – 0.1 pounds
Week 7 Results: -0.9 pounds
Week 8 Results: 0.0 pounds
Week 9 Results: -0.5 pounds
Week 10 Results: -0.6 pounds
Week 11 Results: 0.0 pounds
Week 12 Results: – 0.2 pounds
Week 13 Results: -0.1 pounds
Week 14 Results: No weigh in
Week 15 Results: – 2.3 pounds
Week 16 Results: +0.6 pounds
Week 17 Results: – 0.2 pounds
Week 18 Results: -0.1 pounds
Week 19 Results: 0.0 pounds
Week 20 Results: – 2.4 pounds
Week 21 Results: No weigh in
Week 21 Results: + 0.1 pounds
Week 22 Results: -0.2 pounds
Week 23 Results: – 0.6 pounds
Remaining weight to lose: 19.3 pounds
If you want to follow along with me, friend me on MyFitnessPal or FitBit!
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Jenna Crowley
Jenna used to be known as 2NOTBrokeGirls, but then one of the girls actually went broke, so she's struck out on her own. Jenna spends her free time saving the world, one sorority girl at a time (usually while wearing yoga pants), questioning why she decided to get a doctorate, documenting her love of all things cheese related, and hosting the new PGP podcast Don't Take It From Us. You can ask her anything you want about football, using your boobs to get what you want, and pizza at @JennaLCrowley on Twitter or via email at JennaLCrowley@gmail.com.
@JennaLCrowley
@donttakeitfromus
Girl in the picture is thiccc. Would.
Dumb thicc
10+ lbs lost! Congrats!
It takes me about 3-4 months for my mind to catch up, for better or worse. Lost 40 pounds a few years ago and it took a while to feel good about it, then that feeling lasted until I gained it all back. Just finished losing it all again, and still feel like I need to keep going.. taking before/after pics helps a lot but it’s kinda weird having that lag in perception
The second you look in the mirror and you’re happy with what you see, baby, you just lost the battle.
I always appreciate a good Scrubs reference… Johnny C. McGinley looks like he can put up big boy weight in the gym
This phenomenon is so interesting! Peeps suffering from Anorexia Nervosa also experience this- they literally see/perceive themselves as larger than what they are and fMRIs showed a deficit in the spacial map area of their brains. (I’m a 4th year doc student in clinical psych specializing in body image & eating disorders, not just some nerd who randomly knows this shit)
Perfect username.
Is there an opposite? Where you look at the numbers on the scale and say “whoa I’m huge” and then look in the mirror and think “eh, not terrible, I’ll keep eating cookies?” Asking for a friend.
If I remember correctly from my psychopathology I class, I think that’s called denial
I experience this ALL the time. It sucks and I feel for you. My boyfriend is constantly confused by it and says things like, “How do you not realize how tiny you are?” It sounds like a bitchy problem to have but it genuinely bothers me constantly that I feel like I look way bigger than my peers/friends and impacts self-confidence a lot. Long way of saying, I appreciate you sharing this experience and you are not alone!
Damn Jenna’s been killing the game for a while.
Thanks for posting this. Was thinking this morning how can I still be so uncomfortable around mirrors 50 lbs down? Now comes the mental work I guess