Five People That Had A Worse Weekend Than You: Baseballs And Bats

Five People That Had A Worse Weekend Than You: Baseballs And Bats

The first weekend of spring was technically a few weeks ago, but if you live in New England like I do, the spring weather didn’t officially come until this weekend. Therefore I spent a lovely weekend engaging in one of my favorite activities – shopping – while strolling outside from store to store instead of having to go elbow to elbow with the annoying teenagers at the mall. But while I have a great weekend buying a Maverick-from-Top-Gun koozie and a pencil set with inappropriate sayings on them for the office, some other people didn’t exactly have the world’s greatest weekend.

The Washington Nationals

It’s only the first week of the season, but it’s safe to say that Week 1 didn’t end of the way the Nationals wanted it to.

The team was in Philadelphia facing the Phillies on Saturday evening when they were absolutely pummeled…in the first inning. The Phillies bats scored 12 runs in their first at-bat, getting nine hits and four walks off pitchers Jeremy Guthrie and Enny Romero. The Phillies ultimately won the game 17-3, and in doing so, handed the Nationals a new record for runs allowed in an inning with their dominance in the first.

Nationals skipper Dusty Baker summed the game up pretty well, saying: “It was like a nightmare out there. That’s the most runs starting out a game that I can ever remember. That was a real bad loss.”
Read bad indeed. [Via USAToday]

Ian Kahaloa

Cincinnati Reds pitching prospect Ian Kahaloa has already been suspended 50 games after violation of Major League Baseball’s minor league drug program after having a second positive drug test. But over the weekend, things probably got worse for Kahaloa after videos he posted on Snapchat of him last month of using drugs were brought to the team’s attention.

Kahaloa posted four videos, including one showing him snorting a white powder and another with the caption “wake and bake” with marijuana paraphernalia. Needless to say, the team was not pleased. Reds player development director Jeff Graupe told the Cincinnati Enquirer,

We’re obviously really concerned.

We’re working to get Ian the help and assistance that we believe he needs to get his long-term future to a more stable place. We’re kind of putting the baseball on the backburner.

Any time you have a situation like this, or really anything with a negative connotation, the first thing you address is the situation itself.

This isn’t necessarily a social media problem. It’s let’s address the lifestyle and not put ourselves in those positions. Then from there, there is the message of that in the modern day, there’s fewer closed doors.

Ummm, not to disagree with Mr. Graupe. But it’s definitely a social media problem. [Via]

Some NFL Players

There are a lot of benefits to being an NFL player, of course, but there are also some pretty harsh restrictions. In particular, the prohibition of NFL players and officials from appearing at casinos in a promotional capacity seems to be an issue that comes up pretty regularly. If you’ll remember, there was a big brouhaha over Tony Romo appearing at the 2015 National Fantasy Football Convention, which was ultimately cancelled.

The newest drama around the policy involves something called The Pro Football Arm Wrestling Championship, which was held at the MGM Grand casino this weekend and will air on CBS in May. Per’s David Purdum, the league is investigating if the players who participated, including the Steelers’ James Harrison, violated league policy.

Joe Lockhart, the NFL’s executive vice president for communications and public affairs, told USAToday, “Had we been asked in advance if this was acceptable, we would have indicated that it was in direct violation of the gambling policy. No one sought preapproval.”

Insert sarcastic comment about the NFL caring more about its gambling policy then its domestic violence one here. [Via Bleacher Report]

Two People In Florida

Honestly, it’s bad enough to just be two people in Florida, the armpit of America. But being two people in Florida that have to get treated for rabies because you found a dead bat in your bag of prepackaged salad…well, that makes being stuck in the Sunshine State just a little bit worse.

The dead rodent was found in a bag of Fresh Express Organic Marketside Spring Mix that had been purchased at Walmart, causing a recall of the salad in not just Florida, but Alabama, Georgia, Louisiana, Mississippi, North Carolina, South Carolina, and Virginia as well.

The CDC said that the deteriorated state of the bat would not allow them to conclusively rule out rabies, hence why the people that ate the salad are undergoing the rabies protocol, despite a low-to-zero risk of transmission.

Anyone else never buying bagged salad again? [Via CNN]

Jan Flato

Mr. Flato is also a resident of the great state of Florida, and he likely had just as bad of a weekend as the bat salad eaters.

Flato hit a 100,000 jackpot on a slot machine at the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino in Fort Lauderdale back in January. Awesome, right? Except that due to a technicality, Flato didn’t collect his winnings – his female companion did.
Flato told his friend Marina Navarro to push the button on his slot machine “for good luck.” The luck certainly followed in the form of a big win, but since Navarro was the one to spin the reels, despite it being Flato’s money in the machine, she was the one to take home the cash – cash she now refuses to share with Flato.

Since then, the two, who met at another casino in 2015, are now feuding publicly, with each giving different versions of the story to local newspapers. Flato says that Navarro should hand over at least a cut of the jackpot and Navarro claims that Flato is trying to ruin her reputation.

Sigh. What is wrong with people? [Via Daily Mail]

Image via YouTube

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Jenna Crowley

Jenna used to be known as 2NOTBrokeGirls, but then one of the girls actually went broke, so she's struck out on her own. Jenna spends her free time saving the world, one sorority girl at a time (usually while wearing yoga pants), questioning why she decided to get a doctorate, documenting her love of all things cheese related, and hosting the new PGP podcast Don't Take It From Us. You can ask her anything you want about football, using your boobs to get what you want, and pizza at @JennaLCrowley on Twitter or via email at

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