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Hello from Nashville! As many of you know, Father’s Day is a bit difficult for me after losing my dad a few years ago, so I decided that a mother/daughter trip was in order this year. So I’m writing this while lying in bed in a hotel in the Music City after eating my weight in hot chicken, and I’m not complaining, although the scale might during this week’s weigh in.
I won’t lie – despite the vacay, this weekend was still a bit tough. Frankly, whoever said this gets easier is a liar. But that being said, I was blessed with an incredible dad, and a fantastic mom who has now assumed both parenting roles, plus I’m going to a plantation to eat grilled pimento cheese tomorrow, so all in all, life is pretty good. Better than some people’s, anyway.
Miguel Anaya Pablo
The minute I saw the headline “Drunk farmer starts fight with his own pig but dies after having three fingers and his privates bitten off,” I knew we had a story that must be told in this column, because who could possibly be having a worse weekend than this guy?
Sixty-year-old Miguel Anaya Pablo, a farmer in the town of San Lucas Ojitlan, in south-western Mexico, returned home from a party and apparently got into a “fight” with the pig, who lived in his home. According to The Sun, “The animal managed to bite his testicles and severe [sic] three fingers of his right hand and he was rushed to hospital,” where he later died from an infection caused by the wounds.
Well, there’s not really much else to say here, is there? [Via The Sun]
Waldo Santiago
It was a bad weekend for dudes with pets, apparently. And also one for people who live in Santiago’s building in New York, where his snake is on the loose.
53-year-old Santiago was bitten by his snake on Saturday morning in his apartment in Hell’s Kitchen. He was taken to the hospital and has since been discharged, but the snake is still on the loose, prompting the New York Police Department to issue an alert to those in the building to be on the lookout for the reptile, particularly because it’s breed is unknown.
Hmmm, after these two stories, can we all agree to stick to cats and dogs as pets? [Via New York Post]
Juvenile
Juvenile backed that azz up…right into jail.
The rapper, whose real name is Terius Gray, was arrested on Friday after he finished a show at Southport Hall in Louisiana. The charge? He apparently owes the mother of his son $150,000 in child support.
According to reports, Juvenile has skipped several court dates in the case, so Civil Court Judge Nakisha Ervin-Knott sent the 41-year-old to a jail in New Orleans on Saturday; he’ll stay there for 30 days if he chooses not to pay up.
Come on dude, you gotta pay for your kids. But let’s remember happier times, shall we?
[Via New Orleans Advocate]
Coconut Oil Devotees
For a while, people have been pushing coconut oil on me and telling me I should incorporate it into my diet. Now, as I’ve said previously, I don’t care for unsolicited diet advice and in this case, I was apparently right not to listen.
In a recent advisory published in the journal Circulation, the American Heart Association (AHA) said that coconut oil, which is 82 percent saturated fat, can raise “bad” cholesterol levels just as much as butter, beef fat, or palm oil. An increase in bad cholesterol can lead to atherosclerosis – the hardening and clogging of arteries that leads to heart attacks, strokes, and other cardiovascular diseases.
The advisory also discusses how some studies about weight loss have pointed to a fat found in coconut oil, medium-chain triglyceride, and how it may increase metabolism. However, according to Mashable, “those trials involved consuming unusually high levels of the fat — more than you’d realistically consume when mixing coconut oil into your diet,” even if you are doing a high-fat diet like Paleo.
See? This is why I don’t take advice from anyone but my nutritionist. [Via Mashable]
Cory Allen
I know nothing about rugby. Literally nothing. But even I know that what David Halaifonua did to Allen during the matchup between Tonga and Wales was out of control.
Ouch.
[Via ESPN]
Monday Morning Boost
Also, I’m going to try something new this week and you can let me know in the comments how you feel about it. While reading about five people that had a worse weekend than you is likely a welcome boost on a Monday morning, I’ve been thinking for a while that I wanted to start also including something each week just to make us all smile on the crappiest day of the week. So, to kick it off, here’s an orangutan with a fidget spinner..
THEY'RE JUST LIKE US. 41-yo orangutan at an Austrian zoo mastered a fidget spinner given to her by a zookeeper, https://t.co/2GwlZllsDj pic.twitter.com/APzV8mMr4C
— CBS Evening News (@CBSEveningNews) June 14, 2017
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Jenna Crowley
Jenna used to be known as 2NOTBrokeGirls, but then one of the girls actually went broke, so she's struck out on her own. Jenna spends her free time saving the world, one sorority girl at a time (usually while wearing yoga pants), questioning why she decided to get a doctorate, documenting her love of all things cheese related, and hosting the new PGP podcast Don't Take It From Us. You can ask her anything you want about football, using your boobs to get what you want, and pizza at @JennaLCrowley on Twitter or via email at JennaLCrowley@gmail.com.
@JennaLCrowley
@donttakeitfromus
What level of heat did you try on the hot chicken?
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This sleep depriving weekend caused me to notice three hours into work, today, that I had toothpaste ALL over my lips. Thanks for the heads up, no one.
Lol that fidget spinner video made me crack a smile, thanks Jenna!
What’s most interesting about this article is that people show up to a Juvenile concert
100% would attend.
What I meant to say was its interesting that anyone would go with you** sup?
Without** my gosh did I butcher that
How do you find such a variety of obscure stories? Or do you just have the most insane Google News alerts?
What do you think would hurt worse between getting hit by a 100 lb bag of sand moving at 30 mph and that rugby hit?
Asking because I took a bet saying I’d let somebody hit me with a bag of sand going 30 mph.
You might want to dust off the old physics textbook from high school and give it a quick once over.
So you’re trying to say you want to get hit my a 100lb bag of sand going 50km an hour, I wouldn’t recommend it
No I’m not saying I want to. I’d actually rather not do it. That’s not the question. And changing it to km/h won’t make it hurt less.
I have no idea how this would work but please share it with us when you make it happen
So many people downvoted it, I wasn’t sure people wanted to see this.
Oh no I’m sure I’d love to see it, I just wouldn’t recommend it. Also I live in Canada so changing it to Km helped me visualize.