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The View
Expectation: Gorgeous views of the city skyline from a spacious balcony.
Reality: A view of the Chili’s across the street and your neighbor’s dogs doing it.
Parking
Expectation: Reserved, covered parking spot.
Reality: Parking tickets.
Decor
Expectation: Oak floorboards, fresh paint and a skylight.
Reality: Linoleum tile, cracked paint and carpet that’s older than you are.
Location
Expectation: Right in the heart of the city. Where the action is.
Reality: A $15 cab ride from anywhere.
Your Roommate
Expectation: Just a really cool person who lets you do you, pays rent on time and is potentially your future best friend.
Reality: A psycho who doesn’t clean up after themselves and is constantly fighting with their significant other.
Local Fare
Expectation: Awesome local pubs and restaurants with awesome taco trucks.
Reality: First name basis with the night manager at Wendy’s.
Bar Scene
Expectation: Pretty much like New York City.
Reality: A 10-block walk to the nearest “bar,” which is a TGI Friday’s.
Neighborhood
Expectation: Dog parks, plenty of trails, and young professionals.
Reality: The apartment complex next door has a 10-foot tall fence around it, so you wouldn’t know.
Amenities
Expectation: Pool, state-of-the-art gym, conference room, billiards room, washer/dryer in unit, complimentary massages every Sunday.
Reality: A broke-ass basketball hoop.
Landlord
Expectation: Really cool young person who lives on the property and always has a handyman on call 24-hours a day and tech support standing by for any Wi-Fi issues.
Reality: They left the country for two weeks without telling you.
Furniture
Expectation: Plush leather sectional couch, nice coffee table and your very own La-Z-Boy.
Reality: Busted Craigslist couch and an unassembled IKEA end table.
Neighbors
Expectation: A couple of single hard bodies.
Reality: A 45-year-old divorcee who wants to have a devil’s threesome with you and your roommate.
Rent
Expectation: Can’t believe how cheap I got this place!
Reality: This is horseshit.
Friends
Expectation: 
Reality:
Respond
Brian McGannon
What do I love? I love happy hour, a good golf tan, and getting moderately drunk during dinner.
@BrianMcGannon
@brianmcgannon
brianmcgannon
Solution: I live with my parents because I’m poor as shit.
Landlord: Reality: They left the country for two weeks without telling you
holy shit every single landlord i’ve had disapears back to the middle east then shows up unannounced after any problems have been fixed out of pocket
It’s really not that hard to find a nice place to live. Share a house/apt with college friends who work in the same city
meh.
Luckily my property manager is the super hot daughter of the seriously rich guy that owns the property. It’s downtown within walking distance of everything, but it’s about the size of my living room in my last apt. win some lose some
She knows you live in a shoe box. Work on your game, go in with a plan.