Don’t Steal A Moped In Front Of Tom Hardy Because He Will Hunt You Down

Don't Steal A Moped In Front Of Tom Hardy Because Bad Things Will Happen

When a common man like myself spots someone getting robbed on the street I think “I wish there was more I could do.” It’s not that I don’t want to help, it’s just that I freeze in those situations and stand by watching it happen from the sidelines, sulking in my pillow later at what a pussy I am.

There isn’t a day that goes by when the thought doesn’t cross my mind what it must be like to be a badass who isn’t scared to take action for what’s right with brute force. While some of us dream that life, Tom Hardy lives that life.

According to the New York Post, Hardy’s on screen superhero mode kicked in as he brought justice to a thief with his own hands:

“Screen tough guy Tom Hardy nabbed a thief after a Hollywood-style chase in the street.

The “Taboo” star, 39, sprinted after the crook, who crashed a stolen mo-ped and fled.

A witness in Richmond, London, told yesterday how Hardy chased the thief through gardens and across a building site — before proudly announcing: “I caught the cunt.”

The “Legend,” “Batman” and “Taboo” star vaulted walls as he sprinted after the crook — then grabbed him by the scruff of the neck and patted him down for concealed weapons.

Arun Pullen, 22, said: “It was mental — like he’d switched to superhero mode in an action movie. Two boys on the [stolen] moped had jumped a red light and smashed into a car.

“Tom must have been walking down the road. He went off like a shot in pursuit and looked furious. If the kid had been dumb enough to resist, I reckon Tom would have given him a good hiding.”

Hardy, 39, told one onlooker: “This little s—t nicked something and now he’s got himself a ­broken leg.”

As if we needed further evidence, Tom mother fucking Hardy is a certified bad ass.

I hope the producers behind James Bond caught wind of this story. Mark this up as another reason why Hardy should take over the franchise once Daniel Craig steps away for good.

Most of Hollywood’s elite is strolling around with dark sunglasses and a blacked out baseball cap in hopes that they can go about their normal lives without being noticed in the public light. Not Tom Hardy, he needs a clear line of vision at all times to see what’s going on around him and if there’s anything he can do above and beyond what’s called upon a normal human being.

For one, who steals a moped? At that point I think I feel worse for the thieves than the owner of the moped. If anything, they did you a favor of saving you the embarrassment of being seen riding a moped around town. But, stealing is a sin and you’re not going to get away with that on Hardy’s watch.

It’s one thing to have a good civilian chase you after stealing. It’s another to look back and see Tom Hardy is the man chasing you. Of course they crashed trying to get away. For starters, they were probably distracted by his stunning good looks. Game respect game. Then once it sinks in that it’s Tom Hardy you start thinking about the amount of ass he’s kicked on screen and you end up crashing, after you shit your pants.

How about Hardy summing up the incident by casually dropping a “…now he’s got himself a broken leg” line? Not even remotely worried about a lawsuit coming his way. I wouldn’t be surprised to hear Hardy imprisoning himself to prepare for an upcoming movie role and ends up breaking this guy’s other leg in jail just for a laugh.

What have we learned today? You don’t mess with Tom Hardy.

Also, is there anything better than when European’s use the word cunt? It just sounds so much better in those accents. I think as a baby you learn the word Mommy, Daddy and then Cunt right out of the womb in Europe.

[via Page Six]

Image via Shutterstock

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If you take everything I've accomplished in my entire life and condense it down into one day, it looks decent!

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