I don’t have those numbers in front of me at the moment, but I can get them for you ASAP, sir. PGP.

Catching yourself actually enjoying HGTV. PGP.

Asking people if they are going out when you know you aren’t regardless of their answer. PGP.

Using birthday money to pay student loans. PGP.

Your password must contain a number, a capital letter, a foreign country, and the name of one dead president. PGP.

Purposely answering when telemarketers call, just so you can yell at someone without consequence. PGP.

Making the minimum contribution to your 401k. PGP.

Awkward office arguments over the Zimmerman verdict. PGP.

“I didn’t have any problems until the IT guy got a hold of my computer.” PGP.

Getting a bonus, but spending it on plane tickets for a wedding you have to attend. PGP.

Making the switch from regular to caffeine-free. PGP.

That awkward moment when the person that was destroying the toilet in the stall next to you walks out at the same time. PGP.