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There’s listening to Taylor Swift and then there’s listening to Taylor Swift so much that you start to turn the lyrics into your own life story. The result is your new postgrad anthem, guaranteed to make you never hear “Blank Space” the same again.
Had to have you
Way back when
“I could show you incredible things”
College, parties, and keg stands
Saw you there and I thought
Oh my god, that sounds great!
Didn’t realize you’d be my worst mistake
Then I signed my life away
No money, suit and tie
Will someone please just interview me?
Ain’t it funny, hopes were high
Now what the hell’s this economy?
So, hey, to all my friends
Word to the wise: it never ends
Grab your laptop and more ramen
Wanna hear a joke? You’re too poor for the weekend.
It’s probably gonna be forever
And it’s gonna go down in shame
My student loan bills are coming, yeahhh
Barely make more than minimum wage
Got a list of applications
Get in line with “bills to pay”
Rent, water, then Time Warner
And now Sallie Mae
Now we’re young and we’re hopeless
In debt? Yeah, way too far
It’ll leave you speechless, mmm
And with your junky car
Got a list of applications
Get in line with “bills to pay”
But I’ve got a blank check, Satan
And I’ll write your name
One day, news arrives
“I could show you incredible things”
Cubicles, giant lies
Half-ass pay with glass ceilings
Then I find out what you want
Be that girl for a month
Sell my soul for what’s to come
Oh, no
Pinterest, Facebook, then Twitter
Nothin’ to do, got time to burn
Coffee, me, both bitter
Just sitting at my desk all like
Oh my god, what do I see?
It seems the government can’t fund me
Two more months then forced to leave
This is a joke, right? You guys, it’s not funny!
It’s probably gonna be forever
And it’s gonna go down in shame
My student loan bills are coming, yeahhh
Barely make more than minimum wage
Got a list of applications
Get in line with “bills to pay”
Rent, water, then Time Warner
And now Sallie Mae
Now we’re young and we’re hopeless
In debt? Yeah, way too far
It’ll leave you speechless, mmm
And with your junky car
Got a list of applications
Get in line with “bills to pay”
But I’ve got a blank check, Satan
And I’ll write your name
Forty-thousand dollar debt and unemployed
Don’t say I can’t, say I can’t afford ya
Forty-thousand dollar debt and unemployed
Don’t say I can’t, say I can’t afford ya
It’s probably gonna be forever
And it’s gonna go down in shame
My student loan bills are coming, yeahhh
Barely make more than minimum wage
Got a list of applications
Get in line with “bills to pay”
Rent, water, then Time Warner
And now Sallie Mae
Now we’re young and we’re hopeless
In debt? Yeah, way too far
It’ll leave you speechless, mmm
And with your junky car
Got a list of applications
Get in line with “bills to pay”
But I’ve got a blank check, Satan
And I’ll write your name.
Respond
@lnsayers
@lnsayers
#firejaytas
Really Grandx really, you guys post this column over what I sent you. I write my first column in a year about how my roommates are voting me out of my house and you post this crap instead. I am getting voted out of my house survivor style its a ultimate PG, how could you not post it? Look I am not a amazing writer but you guys are so fickle on what you post, any crap from a contributing writing gets tossed on in a second while the rest have to sit around for days just hoping we get choosen. I quit.
I don’t know, either, bro. I cannot fathom why they wouldn’t toss it on here. They’re super fickle about what they post. Sorry you’re homeless.
I am sorry, I shouldn’t of have posted that on your column. You do fine work and are clearly better at this then I am. I was just a little drunk and frustrated, non of which are a good excuse to act rude to a person just trying to do there job.
Thank you for that. And, for real, sorry you’re homeless.
But, Still Single–
Please, like, tell us more about how all your roomies hate you. Did you masterbate into their peanut butter? Are you a huge Taylor Swift fan? Do you always announce to your employer you’re a shitty employee? Do you like sheer shirts?
Sincerely,
Inquiring Mind
You must be the fun one in your group of friends.
You don’t really know how the “reply” button works do you?
#Basic
Hey, look! I figured it out. Die.
Also, sorry you didn’t get ‘choosen’ tough crowd, bruh.