Apple Just Gave The Lamest Christmas Gifts Ever To Their Employees

Apple Just Gave The Lamest Christmas Gifts Ever To Their Employees

Apple is worth over $700 billion dollars. That’s almost twice as much as Exxon Mobil. That’s more than the gross national product of Switzerland. That’s more than the entire friggin’ stock market in Spain. Being worth that much, you’d think they wouldn’t skimp out on holiday gifts.

But, they did. Per Refinery29:

Along with a complimentary nine-month subscription to Apple Music, the company’s recently launched streaming service, the tech giant is gifting staffers a free pair of urBeats headphones — for a combined value of around $190.

Easy there, Daddy Warbucks! So you’re tellin’ me that Apple is giving out free subscriptions to their own music service, which will essentially cost them nothing? And then they’re tossing in some Beats headphones that are just shitty headphones with weights added to the earpieces in an effort to make them feel substantial?

Okay, okay, I will say that it’s nice that Apple is giving their employees anything, let alone something worth almost $200. A lot of people on the grind won’t see as much as a dime for Christmas this year, which is a different story for a different writer.

But, like, maybe they could afford to give a little bit more if they weren’t paying allegedly blind Stevie Wonder to be in their Christmas commercials this year.

Yeah, I said allegedly.

[via Refinery29]

Image via IVY PHOTOS /

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Will deFries (Twitter / Instagram) is a Senior Writer at Grandex and the world's foremost authority on Sunday Scaries (Twitter / Instagram). Email me at

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