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Because if there’s one holiday America needs, it’s one that celebrates the person who makes your life a living hell. It’s just another bullshit reason for Hallmark to sell cards and FTD to sell flowers. Some days, I just wanna burn this motherfucker to the ground. Especially on days like this one. There better be cake in the break room. What would I celebrate before National Boss Day? I’ll tell ya what I’d celebrate…
- National Alison Gold Day. Everyone eats Chinese food for lunch, while listening to that song non-stop for nine hours.
- International Granny Panty Day. Your significant other welcomes you home, wearing only grannie panties.
- Gout Awareness Day.
- French a Homeless Person For 20 Minutes Day.
- Bleu Cheese Dressing And Sour Cream Appreciation Day. Exclusively eat bleu cheese dressing and sour cream for all three meals.
- Canadian Thanksgiving. Thank Canada for existing.
- Any religious holiday that involves fasting.
- Hawaiian Shirt Day
- Jean Shorts Appreciation Day. That might actually be a Florida state holiday. Double checking.
- Delete Everything On Your DVR On Accident Day
- Mexican Tap Water Day
- Stuck On A Big Bang Theory Marathon And I Can’t Find The Remote Day
- Find Out A Family Member Does Porn Day
- PC Load Letter Appreciation Week
- Syrian New Year
- All John Williams Movie Scores Get Replaced With Dubstep Day
- Farrelly Brothers Movie Marathon (Sans Dumb and Dumber and There’s Something About Mary) Day
- 9/11 Truthers Day
- International Twilight Moms Appreciation Day
- National Assistant Manager Appreciation Day
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Brian McGannon
What do I love? I love happy hour, a good golf tan, and getting moderately drunk during dinner.
@BrianMcGannon
@brianmcgannon
brianmcgannon
I’d celebrate the fuck out of Hawaiian Shirt Day.
every friday, cheif. every friday.
I had to doublecheck the author here. But either way, this article sucks.
Me, Myself, and Irene
Shallow Hal
Stuck on You
The Ringer
Heartbreak Kid
Hall Pass
The Three Stooges
That’s not a terrible day to celebrate.
Dude, Fargo.
…that would be the Coen brothers.
#8 thats every friday here in the hawaiian islands… its called “Aloha Friday”