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First off, thanks to all of the Twitter peeps that reached out to make sure my house didn’t spontaneously combust during that weird gas line sitch we had here in Massachusetts late last week. The affected area is about 20 minutes from me and I spent some time this weekend volunteering before the all clear was given for people to return to their homes on Sunday, and I must admit that experience left me feeling slightly less snarky than usual. But I know you people depend on me for your Monday morning dose of sarcasm, so let me see what I can do.
Zane Gonzalez
I have a friend that’s a Browns fan, and I legitimately feel so badly for him that I now actively root for the Browns to win. I just really want those people to get their free Bud Light after everything they’ve been through.
Which is why I’m not going to shit all over Cleveland Browns kicker Zane Gonzalez for his performance on Sunday. Gonzalez missed two field goals and two extra points, the last of which were the go-ahead extra-point attempt and the game-tying field goal attempt, leading to the Browns’ loss.
At the very least, there was a nice display of sportsmanship.
Awesome moment of true sportsmanship between two kickers. 👏 @wil_lutz5 pic.twitter.com/VgxHXVubj3
— The Checkdown (@thecheckdown) September 16, 2018
Well, at least someone has your back, Zane. [via The Spun]
The Bills
The Browns are bad, but not “quit the team in the middle of the game” bad…which apparently the Bills are.
Word is Vontae Davis put on his street clothes at half, said he was quitting and left the stadium, per another source https://t.co/spdxMWrNSd
— Chris Mortensen (@mortreport) September 16, 2018
Yes, that’s correct. 30-year-old Davis, a two-time Pro Bowl cornerback, just said “fuck it” at halftime of the Bills eventual loss to the Chargers, changed clothes, and left the stadium. While nothing has been confirmed yet, it’s believed that Davis didn’t just leave the game, he retired from football completely.
Davis had signed a one-year, $5 million contract with the Bills this offseason, but I’m thinking he’s not going to be honoring that. But given that his $5 mil was guaranteed since he made the opening day roster…who’s the real winner here? [via ESPN]
This Dead Guy
I mean, he’s already dead, so he probably didn’t know that his pallbearers dropped him in pool.
Actually, who know who probably had a worse weekend? The guy that had to fish the dead guy out of the pool. [via Daily Mail]
Mike Seidel
I know they get paid pretty well, but I always feel kind of bad for those reporters that stand outside during a major storm telling us how bad it is outside, like we don’t have windows. But it turns out that it may not be as bad as it looks.
Mike Seidel of The Weather Channel is getting dragged on Twitter this weekend after a shot of him struggling against Hurricane Florence’s wind and rain featured two dudes casually strolling in the background without any difficulty.
The Weather Channel had Seidel’s back, stating “It’s important to note that the 2 individuals in the background are walking on concrete, and Mike Seidel is trying to maintain his footing on wet grass, after reporting on-air until 1:00 a.m. ET this morning and is undoubtedly exhausted.”
Fair, but Twitter wasn’t having it:
Mike Seidel is having it rough though LOL pic.twitter.com/u8zUtDClWy
— Ray Leichner ⚡️⛈🌪 (@stormchaserray) September 15, 2018
But seriously, T&P to every effected by Florence. You can donate to the Red Cross relief efforts here. [via TMZ]
Wisconsin Football
There’s no such thing as a sure thing, the Badgers learned this weekend.
Wisconsin had its first non-conference loss at Camp Randall Stadium since 2003 after kicker Rafael Gaglianone missed a 42-yard field goal with 36 seconds left, causing a 24-21 loss to Brigham Young. (What the hell is it with kickers this week?) The Badger’s 41-game non-conference winning streak had been the longest in the country, but even worse than having their streak broken was the effect of the loss on their playoff chances.
With the loss, Wisconsin basically has to be perfect to make the playoffs, which seems like a tall task for them.
Good luck with that..
[via Washington Post]
Image via Richard Cavalleri / Shutterstock.com
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Jenna Crowley
Jenna used to be known as 2NOTBrokeGirls, but then one of the girls actually went broke, so she's struck out on her own. Jenna spends her free time saving the world, one sorority girl at a time (usually while wearing yoga pants), questioning why she decided to get a doctorate, documenting her love of all things cheese related, and hosting the new PGP podcast Don't Take It From Us. You can ask her anything you want about football, using your boobs to get what you want, and pizza at @JennaLCrowley on Twitter or via email at JennaLCrowley@gmail.com.
@JennaLCrowley
@donttakeitfromus
Browns fan: “Our kicker really screwed us.”
Vikings fan: “Hold my beer”
Packers fan: “No, hold MY beer”
Lions fan: “Lol what’s football”
Live in Wilmington which is essentially an island right now (all roads in and out are flooded) The weekend was hell and it does not look like the flooding will get any better until the end of this week. If you can donate please do, while the national news does sensationalize things, it is pretty bad down here so any help is appreciated.
Wisco’s going to Iowa for a night game this upcoming weekend. Not many teams make it out of a Kinnick night game with a win. See Michigan 2016 and Ohio State 2017.
What do you expect from a stadium built on an ancient Indian burial ground in view of all those sick children
The wave at Kinnick is still one of the coolest things in football though
100%. Anyone who isn’t terrified of a night game at Kinnick doesn’t know big ten football
Pretty sure Vontae Davis retired after catching a glimpse of me puking in the 2nd quarter of the bills game. At least he made it to half time.
And to those wondering, yes we still go through tables.
Wisconsin just didn’t have a good weekend in sports – period. For the Badgers, I’ll be salty if they don’t make playoffs but as long as they beat TheOSU this year, I’ll be content.
With all due respect, Wisconsin might not win the worst Power 5 Division in cfb, let alone make the playoffs. I’d be focusing on Iowa and not Ohio State or the playoffs.
As a Wisconsin fan that hates all things Ohio State, I’m still going to have to say as long as the Badgers win that game, I don’t care where they end up. Especially after the game last year.
That is, if we were to ever get that chance to play them this year.
I mean, ya’ll have that looked like shit even in your wins this year. Not to be a debbie downer, but Ohio St. is prob the only B1G team that could make noise in the playoffs. It’s Bama and then everyone else. Fuck Bamers though.
Username checks out.
God, USA, SEC
Hard to make the playoffs when you suck
I work where the houses were catching on fire, I peaced out Thursday when it started. Youre a better person than me.