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The other day, I was trying to catch up with The Walking Dead. I know, I know, it sucks now. Most normal people stopped watching The Walking Dead years ago due to terrible writing. Well, I’m a sucker for zombie shows so I figured I’d wait for the season to be over so I can binge-watch them online.
Little did I know that even though AMC and Comcast said I had a few weeks to stream them from their website, it decided that I would not be winding down from a long day at the office and stated something to the effect that “this is unavailable.” I literally turn on my TV once a month — why in the hell can’t I stream something I paid for? So I did what any other normal person under the age of 60 would do and Googled for 30 seconds to find a stream. I cannot confirm nor deny if it worked but I can tell you Season Eight of The Walking Dead was ass.
Something I’ve learned in this life is that if it hasn’t been monetized yet, it soon will be. Sometimes, I go to the university’s rec center before or after work. As an undergraduate, parking was free to anyone. As anyone else that’s been to college knows, we pay enough fees. This little slice of free parking was a nugget of hope in a sea of bullshit. But then some pencil dick administrator proposed in some meeting to add metered parking, even for students, to the rec center. The further away ones are $.50 and the Cadillac close-ups are $1.25 an hour. I know for a fact the rec center people opposed it, but some asshole had to go and justify their bloated salary.
I’m a simple man. It’s not even the money, it’s the principle. I know that if I don’t pay the pittance, the parking authority will be on my car like sharks to blood in the water and give me a ticket. They don’t get paid enough to care but fake it till they make it just like the rest of us. I don’t fault them for their marching orders and I’m sure there are quotas that need to be met.
Please don’t interpret this as I am one of those “taxation is theft” people. I sometimes get where these people are coming from because so many hands are dipping into our pockets — it’s easy to become defensive. Sadly, wages have not kept up with the times and shit keeps getting more expensive. I vote for levies for higher teachers’ salaries, school expenses and community recreational sports (even though I don’t have and never desire to have children) because I don’t want stupid, shitty asswipe children around me, even if my town voted down the $12 a year/family to improve recreational fields.
The point is, we as a people are continually being squeezed from any form of creature comforts. Comcast could easily make their overpriced cable package come with a free HD upgrade considering everything else looks like it’s being played on a Sega Genesis. People are so goddamned greedy, always trying to find a profit in everything. Often, I feel like we forget that we are all human.
If this sounds all sorts of fucked up to you, buckle up, buckaroo. Years of politicians being bought and sold on a market from both sides have left us with a mess. We’re living in Inverted Totalitarianism. By this I mean, “a system where corporations have corrupted and subverted democracy and where economics trumps politics. Every natural resource and living being is commodified and exploited by large corporations to the point of collapse as excess consumerism and sensationalism lull and manipulate the citizenry into surrendering their liberties and their participation in government.” Sound familiar?
“But Madoff, what can we do?” How does the average, garden-variety millennial like you and I make it in this nutty existence? We had no hand in this but eventually, we’re going to get handed a bill. It’s like when you order the appetizer in a group of 20 people and they want to split the bill. What do you mean you don’t want to go to TGIFridays and watch all the mid to late 40s divorcees banter? I wish I had the answer for you.
The other day, I was watching The Last Waltz (also pirated). It’s a Scorsese film following The Band at their last show. They do interviews in between songs and, out of nowhere, Richard Manuel blurts, “I just wanna break even.” No one has ever said so simply and succinctly how I felt. Our generation has and will continue to be innovative. Hopefully, we can restore some sanity and humanity to the world. .
Respond
Madoff
I specialize in damage control, being the drunkest at any and all functions and social assassination. Always appreciate a strong gif game. Follow me on Twitter. Sometimes I put up cool stuff about golfing at the local dirt tracks.
@BLMInvestment
Written by Maddoff with special editorial direction from Nevid
Madoff doesn’t need anything from me. Him, Shibby, and I have been around the block a few times on here
Did shibby re-brand without saying anything? cause I haven’t seen that name around these parts in quite some time.
Shibby has transcended physical and digital form. Shibby is consciousness. Shibby is all of us lol
I am Shibby.
I am Shibby.
I am Shibby.
Shibby is at happy hour with The_Chilis_Guy.
Gonna see the big guy this weekend. We’re going to do it big
I am Shibby.
Best,
JG
Not to take anything away from the great Nevid, but I’ve been at this for over three years my guy. Dude is still a legend though.
Man, your pieces are always so dead on. I used to dream of sports cars and a big house with a pool, now I’m just happy when I can go to El Tiempo twice a week or when I can pay my bills and still throw down a five spot on the Texans game. God bless America y’all
Always dreamed of big weddings, making bank, living the meme dream. Now I want to open an animal rescue and travel a bit. Thanks for the kind words.
You know you have a connection with good seats to the Texans games right? Let me know if you ever want to go, we might not use them.
Not to burst your bubble, but the first headline when I googled “El Tiempo Houston” is “Montrose Mainstay El Tiempo 1308 Cantina Will Shutter” as of 3 hours ago.
That’s fine. One location of many, plus they probably got paid a ridiculous amount for the land. El T as a whole is not going anywhere.
Burn it all down and try again.
It is sad that at this point I will gladly pay the bullshit fees on Ticketmaster etc if they would just show the full price on the selection screen.
Seat geek gives you that option. It’s great.
Your headline had me thinking you wanted to break even in sports betting because I too just want to break even. College Football is just around the corner, friends!
I feel this so hard as I’m trying to fight a $700 move-out bill on top of a lost security deposit from my last apartment for clean up fees and replacements when I left it like new.
I don’t know where you live, but in Houston, I’m a member of TX legal and it’s great. It’s like a monthly insurance fee where some things cost out of pocket, but many things including traffic tickets, civil suits, etc (like apt bills) are completely covered. I use them all the time for this crap. When you throw lawyers at people they often back down and it won’t break the bank. My whole family is covered for like $22 a month.
Everyone hates lawyers until they need us.
Did you take photos of the place before and after you moved out?
Nope I was naive and did not. Lesson learned the hard way.
Madoff, a…life changing…wether it works or not…opportunity has hit my desk so to speak. Entrepreneurship. It would quadruple my yearly income. A start at actual generational wealth. I think I’m going to take the opportunity. The asking price is high but he rewards should be higher yet. I don’t want to be the guy that looks back at my life and curses myself for not taking the chance when I had it. Here goes…everything.
Go get you some, my man. Best of luck.
Make it happen man. Good luck and keep us updated
Always aiming for more.
Madoff with two articles this week makes this a great fucking week.
The Last Waltz is incredible
Truly my favorite movie. Probably going to watch whilst tipsy this weekend and tear up a lot.