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When I woke up this morning, hungover and still wearing a green bowtie, the last thing I wanted to do was see how much money I had spent this weekend. My plan, just like every week, was to avoid checking my bank account until my emotional and mental state could handle it (usually Tuesday). However, I’m a slave to content, so for your entertainment, I took the plunge and opened up my Band of America app and am baring my spending decisions to the world. I apologize for any spelling or grammar mistakes; I’m still hungover.
Friday
What I Spent:
– Groceries, $26.88
– Online gambling, +$12.60
Knowing that Saturday was going to be my undoing, I made a strong attempt to save on Friday, and am pleased with the results. I stocked up on food for my drunk ass to eat over the weekend (including a bag of dinosaur chicken nuggets because I’m a child). I also ended up a few dollars up after a tumultuous rollercoaster of a gambling day, mainly due to a garbage time 3-pointer from a 19-year-old kid who’ll never know how invested I was in his game.
How I Saved
Knowing that I was due to start drinking at 9 a.m. Saturday morning, I stayed the fuck in on Friday. I celebrated #PastaFriday, as is tradition, and was sound asleep by 11 p.m. I also chose to not let my winnings ride on the late tournament game, which I surely would have lost.
Where I Should Have Saved:
I could have purchased non-dinosaur-shaped chicken nuggets for about $2 cheaper. I stand by my choice.
Saturday
What I Spent:
– McDonald’s, $30.62
– Drinks at Old Town Social, $40.00
– Uber, $15.62
St. Patrick’s Day won again. I picked up a big ol’ bag of Mickey D’s McGriddles for the boys on the way to my friend’s house, because I’m a good guy like that. Also, because he was supplying all the booze and told me to get breakfast. I drank copious amounts of Irish Car Bombs, Guiness, and Jameson, and blasted Dropkick Murphys all morning. After several hours of drinking, we made our way to Old Town Social and continued with several more hours of drinking. According to my Uber receipt, my body tapped out at around 4pm, at which point I can only assume from the amount of crumbs in my sheet that I ate a thousand chicken nuggets in bed, like the refined gentleman I am. All in all, I celebrated the holiday like your average douchebag.
How I Saved:
Luckily, I used to work with several of the bartenders at Old Town Social. and for some reason, they like me enough to hook me up with drinks and discounts, so my blackout was relatively cheap. I also opted to actually eat the chicken nuggets I had purchased for this occasion, instead of forgetting about them and asking my Uber driver to go through the McDonald’s drive-thru, like I usually do.
How I Should Have Saved:
I could have drank more at the party, blacked out sooner, and been asleep in my bed by 12:30 p.m., as I’ve done in years past. However, that also increases the chances of me rallying and going out at night, which would have ultimately been my demise. All in all, I did as best a job I could at protecting my wallet from the brutality of St. Patrick’s Day.
Sunday
What I Spent:
– Online gambling, $15.00
– Brunch, $16.82
My girlfriend and I hit a trendy Italian spot around the corner of my house for a good hungover brunch where we both inhaled our food in silence, pausing occasionally to grunt a word of conversation to each other. After this romantic meal, I retreated back to my couch, where I spent all day watching March Madness and occasionally tossing a five dollar bet in the mix to keep things exciting.
How I Saved:
I split the bill for brunch, because I’m a gentleman and a feminist, and didn’t spring for my usual Bloody Mary because I was too hungover to stomach even the thought of alcohol. I ate roughly five pounds of pasta for dinner, which cost me nothing except for possibly a point or two of attractiveness in the form of an extra layer of fat.
How I Should Have Saved:
I could have not gambled on the basketball games, especially considering I have zero knowledge of the schools involved and have never watched a college regular-season game before. I could have been content to watch kids leave their heart and soul on the court in dramatic, fight-til-the-buzzer games. I suppose I could have enjoyed these feats of athleticism and willpower without the need to be financially invested. But that’s just not who I am. I’m a gambler at heart. Not a good one, by any stretch. But a gambler none the less.
Total: $132.34
I’m proud of myself. I did St. Patty’s Day weekend for under a bill and a half, had a great time, and didn’t lose my phone or try to take a nap on the sidewalk. Is this growing up? I think this is growing up. .
Respond
Nick Arcadia
The opposite of a life coach. Email or DM me if you want some bad advice: nickarcadiapgp@gmail.com
@noampao
noamio
Only spending $132 on St. Patty’s Day in Chicago is truly an impressive feat
Especially the low $40 bar tab. How does that happen on St. Patty’s?
Know the bartenders and drink only rail liquor.
You should get this on your tombstone.
No idea.. My credit card was not quite as lucky as his
I spent $150+ before even leaving the bar so $130 for the entire weekend is impressive
Sounds like fun. Spent $20 in gas for the Merc and $15 for pizza. And a few bucks for hostess cupcakes in vending
Definitely spent more at a single bar this weekend
Our fraternity house cook in college made Dino Nuggets and fries for lunch once a month. It was awesome.
I somehow dropped under $200 on a Boston trip this weekend, thanks to a generous fellow PGPer who picked up the Airbnb (and is way faster at sliding his credit card than I am, apparently), and a 55 year old woman named Kim who bought us well over $100 worth of beer. Kim is the real MVP.
I need to know if you used sauce with the dino nuggets or if you just went dry on em
Roughly a gallon of ketchup.
I did the River North bar crawl…what a horrible waste of time. Guy at Joy District said it was a $40 cover on top of the already $50 for the crawl…
We got to our first bar and didn’t even bother trying to go anywhere else because of the lines. Pretty sure they were short pouring too, I’ve never drank that much and not even gotten a little bit drunk
Impressed. My friends felt the need to cover nearly every Chicago neighborhood Saturday. So the uber charges definitely racked up
Spent $500 on PEDs and hotel room before I got out of bed Saturday morning. Not willing to check bar tabs yet
I high key love this username.