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Read The Episode Recap. You’ll Like It.
And then there were two. Arie has made his decision. After weighing his options and vetting the candidates (and by vetting I mean seeing them naked), he’s decided that the second runner-up, the gal who goes to hometowns, then goes to poundtowns, then gets the boot, is none other than Cinderella Story Kendall.
To her credit, we haven’t seen an underdog story like hers in ages. She belongs in the pantheon of 1980 USA Olympic hockey team, 2005-2006 George Mason Final Four run, 2015-2016 Leicester City (I threw that in there for Will). If you told me that the taxidermist made it to the final three I’d laugh in your face and show you pictures of Caroline. Of Maquel. Of Marikh. Smoke bombs who don’t stuff dead animals to make the time pass. But that’s why we tune into the show. The games aren’t fought on paper, they’re fought on the screen every Monday night, and by God I don’t know if we’ll ever see a run like Kendall’s ever again.
As always, don’t cry because it’s over, smile because it happened.
Kendall, 26, creative director from Santa Clarita, California
Was she ready for marriage? For sure not. Did she love Arie? Meh, who knows. Is she going to get hella Instagram followers from all this? Yes.
She did taxidermy. Maybe even a fetish? Not sure. She played the ukulele. Sang songs about the (stuffed) birds and the (stuffed) bees. Also, she may not be so broken up about this, well, break up, if we take Jaqueline’s Tweet at face value:
I just want it on the record that @KendallPatrice cried harder when I left. #thebachelor
— Jacqueline Trumbull (@trumbullina) February 27, 2018
Anyway, the reason you all tuned in….
Staring at stairs photocred: @clairelaines
A post shared by Kendall Long (@keykendall88) on
If I could be a flower I’d be a wildflower PC: @clairelaines
A post shared by Kendall Long (@keykendall88) on
RIP. .
Respond
Boston Max
Spending my retirement fund at Trader Joe's and trying to remember to check my mailbox semi-regularly
@BostonMaxG
@boston_maxg
I mean I guess the taxidermy was weird, but she seemed the most normal, and likable of any of the girls on the show.
You know what’s weird? Telling someone on your first one on one date that you’re in love with them, Tia.
She seemed more socially aware than anyone on the show, she put Krystal in the dirt, it seemed obvious she wasn’t going to win it all when she wasn’t gonna drop the “L” bomb after 6 weeks of dating and 4 one on one dates.
Big Kendall guy.
I feel like there are taxidermy shops in hipster shopping areas across the country. At least I saw a few in the Village last time I was there, and I’m sure they exist in Santa Monica. Is it really that odd?
Whatever. Good work, Kendall. You made it to the last three, you aren’t stuck dating Arie for the next few months, and if it’s any consolation, you joined Carly Waddell in my “Bachelor contestants I would actually want to date in real life” hall of fame.
The thing getting taxidermy’d is real love in this society. It’s getting murdered and then stuffed with bullshit and put on display for everyone else to look at. Yeah, sometimes I get deep, guys lol
Watch what you say about Tia, my friend.
Also, normal doesn’t exist in the bachelor world. All these women are desperately looking for love on tv and it’s not because they’re ugly and poor…stay woke
Kendall went from ‘huh I don’t mind taxidermy and she’s hot’ to ‘Don’t you dare pick her Arie, she’s way too good for you’. Maybe it’s just her diction but she seemed to put thought into her talk and think logically while understanding emotions, which is hot as hell.
The “emotional intelligence” taylor from nick’s season used to always talk about.
She looks like modern day Meredith Blake from The Parent Trap
I know I may catch some heat for this but am I the only one that doesn’t think Marikh is one of the hottest on the show this season? She’s always getting shoutouts in pgp articles for her looks, but she just never really did much for me.
No song???
Damnit I knew I forgot something