Every guy has a best friend. Sure, you may have several close friends, but this is your best friend. The one guy who always has your back. He’ll be the best man at your wedding and you’ll be the designated drunk at his. You’d swing at a defensive lineman if that’s what it took to back him up, and he’ll take you to the hospital when that defensive lineman lands a clean haymaker to your orbital bone. And he’s not just your best friend. He’s your brother. As much of a brother to you as your blood brothers, but at what point does your friendship cross a line? At what point does it become a bromance? There’s nothing to be ashamed about, really. Even the most unlikely guys have bromances. That said, here are ten signs you have a bromance.
1. You text each other more than you text any amount of girls combined
If you look at your recent text messages, they’ll probably look something like this:
1. Your best friend
2. The girl you’re sleeping with
3. A girl who really wants to sleep with you (“Heyyy!”)
4. Your mom
5. Another friend
Your best friend always seems to be at the top, usually because when #2 and #3 text you, he’s going to be the first to know and the first person you talk about it with. Be the topic personal or professional, you guys are probably texting each other about it far more often than you text anyone else. Whose opinion matters more (besides your own)?
2. Too many inside jokes
Anyone who hangs around you and your best friend has a lot of catching up to you. You guys have numerous inside jokes and for anyone to keep up they have to have each one explained to them—it can be tedious. Dates end up feeling like third wheels when you two hang out together and most will eventually dip because they don’t know if they can get used to how close you two are.
3. You’ve been yelled at by a girlfriend for paying more attention to him than to her.
Okay, so a few times when you guys all went out together she ended up walking behind you two as you goofed around. Big deal…
4. You know of almost every girl they’ve dated since you’ve known them as well as the backstory.
Because you know their past and current dating situation you can offer keen, shallow insight on what you feel is best for your friend. And you have plenty to give each other shit about and plenty of “crazy ex-girlfriend” stories.
5. You’ve met his parents.
So what if you’ve met his parents more times than any girl has? You’re probably more pleasant, anyways. By pleasant, I mean drunk.
6. You send each other puppy pictures.
They’re usually hunting dogs, but…yeah, puppy pictures.
7. You’ve asked people to take a picture of you two together before.
You have no problem handing a phone to a stranger and asking them to take a picture of you two together. You think girls are the only ones allowed to demand pictures together? That’s a sexist double standard, and I will not stand for it.
8. You have .gif wars.
You can’t touch my Tom Brady high five .gif game.
9. You use emojis when texting each other.
Because using emojis texting any other guy you know would just be weird, you know?
10. You can’t bring yourself to warn him you wrote a column about bromances.