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What Your Office Music Choice Says About You

Your cubicle is your domain. Your home away from home. Your work station. Should you choose to personalize it, you offer outsiders and coworkers insight into your personal life. You adorn it with photos, miniature sculptures, posters, and other tidbits that act as a window into your far more interesting life outside of the office.

But what speaks louder than personal artifacts is your choice in music. What you decide to listen to at work conveys what kind of person you are.

Top 20 Hits/Pop music

gaga2

You are basic. You are boring and cliché. Everyone thinks you’re immature and questions if you’re related to someone in the office. Therefore, nepotism. You’re either a recent college graduate or someone in his or her mid-to-late twenties desperately clinging to a sliver of youth. You’re probably a pretty nice person, but people don’t like you because of your terrible taste in music. Consider other music, like stuff that actually doesn’t suck.

Classic Rock

Seger

You are awesome, fun, and interesting. Don’t change a thing. Especially not your taste in music, because again, you are probably awesome.

EDM

deadmau5

You’re dumb. Who listens to EDM in a professional setting? You are at work, not TomorrowWorld or whatever it is. Save the EDM for festing.

R&B

R-Kelly

You’re a bit of a mystery because nobody really understands what R&B is these days. If it’s old-school R&B, you’re soulful and well-liked. If it’s the new wave R&B crap, you’re a creep and you probably hit on any member of the opposite sex at inappropriate times.

Indie/Alternative

PassionPit_16

You’re a hipster. People think you’re pretentious and kind of annoying, yet they are intrigued by you. The dichotomy between hating your music with a passion and loving it is strong. The same goes for your character. If your hipster music is accompanied with hipster clothing and a hipster attitude, people probably think you’re the worst (and yet they still secretly want to hang out with you).

Reggae

reggae-other-music-tube-381654

The whole office thinks you’re a pothead, even if you aren’t. The people who have an affinity to pot in the office will think you’re the best. The people who don’t like pot will think you’re the worst. Whether you smoke weed or not, you’re mellow and probably would rather be anywhere than sitting at a desk.

Old School Hip-Hop

run-d-m-c-adidas-originals-01

You are bold, no doubt about that. Anyone who listens to music out loud that could drop an obscenity at any time is a badass. You’re probably a little edgier than the rest of the crowd you surround yourself with at work. The older people think you’re a punk, and yet when they hear Public Enemy or KRS One they can’t help but feel nostalgic.

Anything Obscure

blackveilbrides-screamo

You’re obscure. You confuse people. What the hell is “screamo?”

All in all, don’t be an asshole. Wear headphones. Even if your taste in music is universally well-liked, human nature dictates that at least half of the population sucks, and someone will hate it or be offended by it. Save the jam sessions for the post-work-turn-up.

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HallieJJacobs

Beer, music, hikes, nature. That's all I need. Oh, and money. I need that.

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