Not emotionally strong enough to let go of my .edu email. PGP.

I’m a grown man taking a sick day to relive some glory days and play COD 4 with the boys. I have no shame. PGP.

I can’t do work until my anxiety medicine kicks in. PGP.

If I had $1 for every time I heard the phrase “touch base” in the office, I could afford to add avocado to everything. PGP.

Being the neighbor who complains about loud noise instead of the one making it. PGP.

“Synergy.” PGP.

Co workers sending out 8 year old internet memes in emails. PGP.

Boss took the day off. I’m not doing shit today. PGPM.