Found Easter Eggs in my cubicle this morning. PGP.

Almost died from choking on French Fries last night. PGP.

My closet office wife and I broke up, and people have started asking us, “Why aren’t you hanging out with/talking to each other anymore?” PGP.

My boss saw this push notification on my phone: “Your saved job ____ is about to expire. Don’t wait to apply!” PGP.

Jealous of high school kids studying for their AP exams at Starbucks while working remotely. PGP.

Bought a large bag of wings for $10 and had them for dinner everyday this week. PGP.

Printed my resume at work for the new job that I’m interviewing for while my boss was waiting behind me in the line. PGPowerMove.

The only company not taking today off. PGP.

Everyone around me is either in a committed relationship or too old to hang out together. PGP.

Stopped by at a bagel shop this morning and found out the bagel wasn’t toasted after I got to the office. PGP.