Company announced we’re being acquired. Those employees who own shares doubled their investment. I own no shares and am also losing my job. PGP

Clients who earn triple my salary from dividends alone. PGP.

The highlight of my day was going to Chipotle. PGP

That “first time using the heater in 8 months” smell. PGP

“Have you tried rebooting?” PGP.

Every Monday morning: “Is your Outlook frozen?” #PGP

I can’t drink margaritas anymore because of the heartburn. PGP.

“Oh good, you’re still here.” PGP.

I’ve reached a zen-like level of apathy. PGP.

Getting up to go to the bathroom out of boredom, not necessity. PGP.