Unless it’s Sunday, I’ll probably be lighting my group text on fire. I’m not that asshole who acts like he’s so insanely busy that he can’t even respond to a simple “what up” text or one of the daily roast sessions that occur in there. What’s that guy’s deal anyway? What are you doing that’s got you so dialed in that you can’t fire off an SMH or a screenshot of your high school girlfriend that looks great after having 4 kids? Unless you’re military, an accountant during tax season, or a first or second year associate at a big law firm at any point ever, you can find the time.
But if you are that asshole, some evil genius invented a bot that will imitate you and your impeccable group text timing. It’s called The Chat Bot Club, and it runs bots that learn your favorite phrases, emojis, etc. and will mimic them in the group text, per Tech Crunch. The damn thing was created in less than a day at Tech Crunch’s Disrupt Hackathon over the weekend, which is the most ‘Silicon Valley’ thing I’ve ever typed into WordPress.
This is perfect if you’re constantly getting flamed in the group text. Bailed on your boys to stay in and watch Brooklyn? You can take a little hiatus from the group text, turn on the Bot, and it’ll take the beating for you like a damn digital stunt double. Life in the frying pan has never been so easy.
Honestly, 98% of what goes down in the group text is utterly irrelevant to being a productive member of society. You’re only constantly checking it so you don’t miss out on an inside joke, or a TFM Girls screenshot anyway. Maybe with Chat Bot Club you can finally put your phone down and become a productive human again..
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