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The Michelob Ultra Weekend In Review That Isn’t (Yet) Sponsored By Michelob Ultra: June 5

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I started my weekend on Thursday night by flying into New York City to see some friends. That’s right, guys. The city of apples. This was my first time in NYC and the best description I could give after one weekend was Chicago on crack. There’s always something going on and I honestly felt like I had more energy simply by being in the city.

Awesome place, wish I could find a job that would pay me enough money to live there. I’d pack my shit in Chicago and be back in NYC with the quickness. I’ve got a violent hangover right now as I type this at Laguardia, but you all seemed to have another debauchery filled weekend featuring Michelob Ultras. Let’s go!

P.S. Boingo wi-fi is disgraceful. Thirty minutes free and then you’re just booted from the network? Kiss my ass.

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Busch heavy is a fucking abomination.

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Minor league baseball is the best. The baseball comes second to the moderately priced beer.

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Found some cactus limes at a bodega down the street from the apartment I stayed at this weekend. Ran that place dry by Saturday night.

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Sick craft beer, bro. Hope the extra calories are worth it. Spoiler: they aren’t. Grab a Mich Ultra for your boy next time.

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I’ve always maintained that Smart Water is the best bottled water on the market. Probably doesn’t make you any smarter, but toss one of those back in between Michelob Ultras and you’ll be the most hydrated human on the planet.

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It’s honestly impressive that the top execs at Michelob Ultra haven’t reached out to me yet. This girl has a Michelob Ultra tee and what do I have? Squat. Bupkis. #SponsorDuda

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Nice baggies. I have that same pair.

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Skip the manhattans next time you’re looking for a pre-dinner drink. Mich Ultra is better.

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Is the reason I’m drinking a Michelob Ultra in this terminal because I only recently finished biking up a mountain? Maybe. Maybe not. That’s the beauty of Ultra. It adds a wrinkle of mystique to your character.

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A midweek Ultra following a rough day at work might be better than an ice cold Ultra on a Friday night. Not positive, though. I’m gonna have to think about it and get back to you with a final verdict.

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Athletes everywhere agree: Michelob Ultra is guaranteed to make you run faster and jump higher. I’ve also heard tell that it’s good for birthdays.

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Unemployment beers are fantastic. Trust me on that one.

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I live my life by that motto.

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See tweet below…

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8/10 picture. Leave the Bud Light bucket out of the shot next time. We’re going full scorched earth on Bud Light this week. #NotMyLightBeer

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Hi there. Lovely weather we’re having.

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Buckle those bad boys up. Child neglect like you read about.

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I joined a softball team on Wednesday nights starting this month. Already regretting signing up for it because I know I’m going to be too exhausted to go most weeks.

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Jesus Christ. Guy wrote a goddamn novel. That bar he was at is not my favorite spot in the world, though. Ran into a girl there that hates me one time and she threw her twelve dollar vodka soda in my face. It stung my eyes a little bit but she spent fourteen or fifteen bucks for the pleasure of doing it. Her loss.

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I don’t have a horse in The Finals, but I would love to see Lebron get another ring. For being the best player in the world he gets a lot of hate.

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Serious question – is 26 too old to have a neon beer sign in my room? Because I think I need one of these.

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DCO and SCN joining forces. Thanks for sharing, Dave.

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Where are you people getting all of this amazing merch??

Open water and Michey Mantles. Love it.

I honestly don’t know how you guys do Ultras on Sunday. The only thing stronger than water that I stomach on Sunday nowadays is a Perrier with some alka-seltzer. Double seltzer, baby.

Still looking for a friend with a pool this summer. Hit me up.

Where in God’s name do I get a bike like this? Who do I have to kiss on the mouth to get one of these?

This is a wild deal.

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Listen…I know this isn’t a picture of Mich U but my sympathies go out to this guy. That’s just a middle of the road hand dryer right there. Probably left the bathroom with damp hands. Gotta go Dyson Airblade if you want superior drying action.

That’s all I’ve got for you this week. Keep living the Ultra Life, guys. Also, #SponsorDuda.

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Johnny D

fashion icon. @dudaronomy on twitter. e-mail: jduda10@gmail.com

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