Taco Bell, at this point, must be the undisputed master of the food mash-up. Remember that show “Frankenfood” on Spike that featured ridiculous food concoctions like Spaghetti-Burgers, Chocolate Chill, and more ways to cook a turducken than were once thought humanly possible? Well, don’t call it a comeback, because Taco Bell has been running that game for years. Doritos Locos Tacos changed the fast food paradigm, then they obliterated the fast food breakfast game by putting scrambled eggs in a Crunchwrap, and other awesome fake Tex-Mex-inspired breakfast concoctions. And you can’t forget those Cinnabon Delights, the fried cinnamon-bun balls filled with frosting that just melt in your fucking mouth. Legendary. Life-changing. Little bit orgasmic.
Well, if you thought Taco Bell was just going to rest on their laurels, you’re about to get slapped in the face with a burrito supreme of truth, motherfuckers, because they’re demolishing the fast food game once again with their newest menu options, which will be rolling out later this year.
Let’s start with breakfast, the most important meal of the day. Goldman Sachs estimated that in its first year of offering breakfast, Taco Bell claimed 5% of the breakfast market, stealing 1% from its fast food competitors. That’s huge. And to compensate, Sachs said that fast food chains “are now spending record dollars on breakfast ads.” And now they’re rolling out a breakfast item for those with a southern taste: The Biscuit Taco. CNBC got the first look at that bad boy, and it’s a beaut.
“We’ve tried to make chicken and biscuits portable,” said Taco Bell CEO Brian Niccol. The biscuit taco can be filled with eggs and sausage or white meat chicken breaded with a mixture that includes tortilla chips and spices. You want sauce? You got sauce. Jalapeño Honey or Country Gravy. Your choice. It tested well enough in the south that they’re rolling it out nationwide. You’ll see it starting this Thursday, March 26th.
“Our goal here is to make breakfast as famous as late-night,” he said.
Speaking of late-night, Taco Bell is still rolling on the success of the Doritos Locos Taco, which has been a game-changer in the category of “Foods I Crave When I’m Chemically Altered.” Their partnership with Frito-Lay has been staggeringly successful for both companies, so they’re taking it one step further. Later this summer, Taco Bell will begin testing the Fritos Taco. You heard that right, a fucking Fritos taco. A Fritos chip taco shell, filled with chili, cheese, sour cream, lettuce and tomatoes. If you’re not lucky enough to live in a test city, you can get the taco starting in 2016.
“But I’m hungry now, JayTas!” you might be saying, most likely while preparing your “#FireJayTas” comments. Well, guess what, you might be able to soon get Taco Bell on demand — they’ll be testing delivery later this year.
“We want Taco Bell to be on-demand,” CEO Niccol said. “I think delivery plays [into] that.”
Parent company Yum! has a lot of experience with delivery thanks to their Pizza Hut brand, but they have concerns about how well items like tacos and burritos travel, as well as figuring out how to make it cost-effective, thanks to the low, low prices of Taco Bell items.
“We have not figured out yet how to do it, because we want to protect the integrity of the food and the experience that you have,” Niccol said. “There’s still more work to be done, but it’s not far off, I think.”
And if you want something to wash all this tasty news down with, here’s a new sweet option for you. Remember the Cap’n Crunch balls they were testing a while back? The ones filled with milk frosting? Well, according to ESPN’s Darren Rovell, who has all the good food news for some reason, that made it out of the testing stage and will go national later this year.
— Darren Rovell (@darrenrovell) March 24, 2015
All in all, it’s a great day to “Live Mas.” Yo Quiero Taco Bell indeed..