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Stop Planning Your Wedding Before You Even Have A Boyfriend

Stop Planning Your Wedding Before You Even Have A Boyfriend

I’m talking to you, girl with the wedding Pinterest board since freshman year. It’s not cute that you already know exactly what you want your bridesmaid dresses to look like. It’s just creepy. It’s time to focus on the here and now or there won’t even be a wedding in your future.

The main problem with planning your big day way too far in the future is scaring off potential mates. If you begin dating a guy and it slips that you’ve already picked your wedding venue, he’s gonna freak out. This dude was afraid of commitment in the first place. Now he knows that your ability to commit to things is far more aggressive than his. This will surefire cause him to run and never look back. And don’t trust yourself to just keep it a secret that you’ve got it all figured out. We all know there’s a valid chance that after three margaritas you’ll ask him if he’s okay with a vegetarian menu for the occasion (which he obviously isn’t, but that’s besides the point).

Don’t go setting your heart on certain aspects of the wedding that most definitely require his opinion. You can’t pick out your first dance song or number of people in the wedding party without the consent of your groom. Remember how this dude doesn’t even exist yet? You also can’t decide what size wedding you want just yet. Your future hubby could be an only child conceived from parents who were only children or he could have four extended families and be one of eight siblings. You really don’t know what you’re getting into. I guess if you are determined on being a psycho and planning this event right here, right now, stick with deciding things that men couldn’t care less to have an opinion on: colors, flowers, dresses, etc. Save food, music, and alcohol open bar for the guy to choose.

And I know I said to not start planning before you have a boyfriend, but don’t jump the gun the second a dude asks you out. The mere thought of wedding planning shouldn’t be in your mind until at least a couple years with the guy. This way you don’t get your hopes up when you’ve planned the perfect wedding, but Mr. Right walks out the door before he ever gets down on one knee.

While we’re on the subject, don’t you dare try to plan your engagement either. Leave that to him to figure out (or fuck up royally). Let him ask assistance from your best friend, but that’s it. Don’t show your inner control freak until he’s already tied the knot (kidding, only kidding).

Don’t get me wrong, if you attend your friends’ weddings and like their floral arrangements, by all means write a little note in your phone. But don’t go contacting ministers before you even have someone to stand next to at the alter. Otherwise, the only “I do” you’ll be getting from a guy is when it’s followed by “think you’re crazy.”

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22 · Washington, DC

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