By this point, you’ve probably got a pretty good handle on your drunk personality. If you’re me, you get extra judgy, spill secret gossip, and throw humorous (at least, in my opinion) insults at my tablemates for laughs. Obviously, it’s a much more extreme version of myself, but thankfully I stay pretty restrained the rest of the time. Whether you’re a drunk crier, an angry drunk, or a touchy-feely drunk, we’ve always thought that our drunk personalities were somehow separate than our real selves. Unfortunately, according to a new study, everyone else thinks that how we behave while drunk is almost exactly how we behave sober, so now I have to reevaluate my entire personality.
While you can always tell when you’re starting to get drunk because your personality amplifies, a University of Missouri study showed that for everyone else, they really can’t tell the difference between drunk you and sober you. While observers noticed that those who had been drinking were more extroverted, all other personality attributes were the same. Essentially, what this means is that I’m always a judgy, secret-sharing, asshole all of the time – I just only notice it after half a bottle of wine.
If this revelation doesn’t have you shook, I’m incredibly jealous of your drunk personality. For the rest of us judgers, bar fighters, and rando-kissers, apparently, we have our work cut out for us. I guess I need to start working on my personality a lot more than the 4 hours a week I get drunk in public, which I’m honestly not that into. If this sounds like a lot of work for you, take heart – all of your closest friends have seen drunk you, and you’re still part of the crew, so at least if you suck, your best friends don’t mind that much. Now get back out there and be an asshole to the rest of the world, and why you’re at it, take a few daytime shots – it’s not like anyone’s going to notice anyway. .