Welcome to 2017 where our President went from black to orange and it’s finally socially acceptable to get a divorce. We all know that feelings are fleeting and love doesn’t always last forever, so it’s inevitable that divorce is bound to happen and life will go on.
At the ripe age of 26, I already have three divorced friends – so what makes you special? That being said, half the battle is actually getting divorced, but what comes next seems to be a foreign concept for most. So here we are, willing to help you (or that friend you’re asking for), with what to do after the big break up in order to stay sane.
Stop crying – we know you’re sad but we probably are too, so do something that makes you AND those around you feel a little less nauseous. It’s easy to fall into ruts and patterns with ice cream in one hand and the remote in the other. Studies show dopamine levels drop after traumatic events (idk if that’s true), so it’s important to get up and do something each and every day. Find a buddy (preferably another divorced buddy), find a gym/trail and pretend to run, or just find a bottle of vodka, but regardless – you’ll thank us later when you aren’t fat and lonely.
Join a Group
Loneliness is a leading killer these days – no studies prove that, but arguing against it seems pretty hard. Humans are social creatures, we need people in our lives, even weird group-goers. Find something that interests you and join one accordingly. AA counts, so like I said, vodka.
Cooking is magical – and for those of us “creative types”, it’s a great way to channel our energy and really feel inspired again. Find a new dietary challenge and come up with 10 solid meals that correlate – not only will it be fun, but you’ll also lose those 10 lbs you’ve been bitching about for past 3 years.
“I don’t want to see the world” – said no one ever. Get a passport, you’re an adult now in case you were still skeptical – so let’s get it together. Driving to the next town hasn’t been considered a trip since the horse and buggy went out of style. I heard Bali’s pretty chill, let me know if you agree.
They say de-cluttering is the new black – it’s trendy, it’s cool and it actually really helps. The new you needs a new life so why not start by getting rid of all those clothes you bought in 1999 and donate to those in need. Once you lose those 10 lbs, you’ll want new clothes anyways. Happy house, jealous ex-spouse.
Being divorced doesn’t have to be nearly as awful as all those lonely single people say it is; it can actually be quite liberating, freeing, and a great wake up call to get shit done. Use this time wisely, you never know when your next husband/wife might come along – or just another opportunity to drink vodka..