Perfectly Legitimate Reasons To Drink (Or Not) For Every Night Of The Week

Email this to a friend

Favorite

121011_MEDEX_DrunkPeople.jpg.CROP.rectangle3-large

Monday

Why Not?

1. You have work tomorrow.

Why?

1. You have work tomorrow.
2. Monday Night Football.
3. Monday is your toughest day, anyway. Reward yourself.
4. Cheap drink specials.
5. Adam Demamp does it.
6. You won your fantasy game.
7. You lost your fantasy game.

Tuesday

Why Not?

1. You have work tomorrow.

Why?

1. More cheap drink specials.
2. Don Draper does it.
3. MAC Football! #MACtion
4. You have no food. Beer has carbs, right? Close enough.
5. Tuesday is actually your toughest day, reward yourself.
6. It helps you fall asleep.
7. You have work tomorrow.

Wednesday

Why Not?

1. You have work tomorrow.

Why?

1. It’s hump day!
2. You had to listen to coworkers say, “It’s hump day!” all day long.
3. Even more cheap drink specials.
4. Wednesday is the new Thursday.
5. Basketball/baseball/dodgeball/badminton is on some bottom tier sports channel.
6. You have work tomorrow.

Thursday

Why Not?

1. You have work tomorrow.

Why?

1. TWO football games!
2. NBA preseason game.
3. Your team won said game.
4. Your team lost said game.
5. Ridiculously cheap drink specials.
6. Thursday is the new Friday.
7. College kids drink on Thursday and you used to be in college. Drink up.
8. You have work tomorrow.

Friday

Why Not?

1. You have work the next day? Man, your job sucks.
2. Nine dollar beer night.
3. You are Mormon.

Why?

1. It’s why the weekend was invented, for God’s sake.

Saturday

Why Not?

1. You’re attending a some sort of children’s party where alcohol is not allowed. Publicly, at least.

Why?

1. Lots of football. Lots.
2. Your team won/lost.
3. Your rival team won/lost.
4. Seriously, it’s Saturday. Why do I even need to list reasons?

Sunday

Why Not?

1. You have work tomorrow.
2. Church.

Why?

1. More football, this time of the professional variety.
2. Your team winning/losing in football whether real life or fantasy.
3. Three dollar Bloody Marys.
4. You have work tomorrow.
5. You started at family brunch. Why stop?

There you have it. Get to drinking. I am way ahead of you.

Email this to a friend

Favorite

Trending Now

Comments

You must be logged in to comment. Log in or create an account.

  1. 9
    wiscy neat

    I found myself during my senior year drinking a lot more on weekdays than on weekends.

    Nice workMehLog in or sign up to reply. • 1 year ago