My opening line on Tinder was unmemorable, which is probably why I had a total success rate of 0.0% using the app. Sure, a lot of the people I came across were bots. And yeah, I was an early adopter living in a rural area so my geographic range was maxed out. But still, when you’re as good at texting as I was during my prime, Tinder should’ve been cake.
But I moved on. I downloaded Bumble, Hinge, and whatever else was out there. I mixed it up at bars. I even met my girlfriend on Twitter in the most millennial twist of the century. But when nothing seemed to actually be working for me, I always went back to my old temptress who I couldn’t seem to get off my mind –– Tinder.
I was, in fact, on Tinder because I was looking for a relationship. I’m not afraid to admit that. I don’t think I’m unique in that either despite most people being convinced that Tinder is just a means to an end, and that end is getting a little honey on the stinger. But according a study conducted by Tinder themselves, it’s more than that. Per The New York Times:
In a report released this week, Tinder conducted two surveys comparing its users with offline daters. (The offline daters fell into three groups: people who have never dated online, people who had dated online in the past but no longer did, and people who had never used online dating but were open to the possibility.)
According to Ms. Carbino, the findings indicate that Tinder users are more likely to be looking for a committed relationship than are offline daters. She said that the surveys revealed that Tinder users were doing a better job than offline daters of signaling “investment in prospective daters” by asking them questions when originally contacting them, and that they are 5 percent more likely to say “I love you” to their partners in the first year of dating.
You always love to see a study conducted by Company A talking about how successful Company A is at what they’re attempting to do. Can’t imagine this is biased at all, so let’s take these statistics as fact and break them down.
The stigma around Tinder, put bluntly, is that you only download the app because you’re trying to get laid. I’m not saying that’s true or false, but honestly, one of the perks of being in a relationship is getting occasionally laid without having to download an app and sit at the bar making knee-jerk decisions on the opposite sex.
When it comes to the whole “I love you” scenario, five percent is essentially a negligible number. Especially after a fucking year. Who dates someone for a fucking year and doesn’t say “I love you”? Uh, heads up to anyone who’s been in a year-long relationship and hasn’t heard those three words: download Tinder and start rapid-swiping right to build a stable of prospects. Just don’t be shocked when you stumble across the person you’re dating on there.
The study also goes on to claim that “while 30 percent of men who are not dating online say it is ‘challenging to commit,’ only 9 percent of male Tinder users say they find it difficult to maintain a committed relationship.” To which I say, “Uh, yeah, because these guys told their girlfriends they were lucky enough to get selected for a Tinder survey and would be sleeping on the couch if they said otherwise.” It shouldn’t be all that challenging to commit when you’re on a dating app with the intention of committing. Or at least lying about commitment in hopes you get lucky after the first date. Not saying that’s the right way to go about it, but you’re on The Straight Talk Express right now. .
[via The New York Times]
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