My week started out pretty good. Things were flying knowing that I had a very shortened week. Friday, I am taking off for the beach, yesterday we got to leave at 3 pm for a company happy hour, and today we got to come in at 11 am. I was in high spirits all week; that is until about noon yesterday. That’s when the worst hit, I started feeling the beginning symptoms of the common cold. I knew I had to nip it in the bud real quick. I cannot let the terrorists win.
There’s nothing worse than being all set to hit up vacation, only to be stricken with some sort of illness the day before you head out. It’s almost as bad as having to stay late to finish that presentation you put off until just now. To start living the marg life tomorrow, I had to act fast and swiftly. This isn’t my first foray into this sort of problem, so I have this thing down to a science.
As soon as that first sore throat/headache combo began to hit, I went in scrambling mode. I hit the water cooler about 10 ten times in the next three hours. All about getting those fluids in you faster than Bobby Bucher could do. This played to my advantage because it made my short week even shorter by the amount of trips I went to the pisser (protip, right here).
Now, any seasoned veteran of curing your sickness as fast as possible knows that you need some essentials. Unfortunately, because I’m a man of the people and had to get to that happy hour, I wasn’t able to get my hands on these things until this morning. While shmoozing with co-workers, and crushing waters with limes, I said my peace and hit the bed early. Resting up is something that most people skip. Don’t. So I set my alarm for 7:00 am and hoped to God I would be healed by morning.
Spoiler alert: I woke up feeling worse. Couldn’t swallow without it feeling like one of those medieval maces was going down the hatch. The headache was worse. I was in full-on panic mode. I can’t be bed-ridden in the hotel while my girlfriend is soaking up the sun. With margs and sun on my mind, I buckled up and got desperate: I hit the gym. I kept it pretty light for a workout. A light run, did some light lifting, and finished up on the rowing machine. Needing to build up more of a sweat, I hit the sauna for a good ten minutes.
On the way home, I snagged some DayQuil, Ibuprofen, Pedialyte, and some Gatorade to mix the Pedialyte with. Despite having no appetite, I forced down a nice sized breakfast, took a hot shower, and headed to work. I’m not about to skip any crucial step at such an important itme. This is where the pros separate themselves from the rooks.
You’ve got to pound all this shit on the reg. DayQuil says take two capsules every four hours? You take two capsules every two hours. Doctors recommend taking two Ibuprofen? You can get away with four. Trust me, I’m not a doctor, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night. You’re going to also want to be chugging a 70/30 Gatorade/Pedialyte cocktail like you’re back in your college days.
Currently, sitting here at 2 PM and I feel like I’m headed in the right direction. I’m still going to crush the meds/electrolytes until I hit the hay at 9. Overdoing it is what’s right. By this time tomorrow, I’ll be crushing margs under the sun. Always be crushing..
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