As you may be aware, we “lost” an hour of sleep yesterday for Daylight Saving Time. I know, this is probably difficult for you to talk about right now, as you may be still reeling from the life-altering affect of losing a single hour of sleep, but we need to address this issue head on. There’s been a formidable amount of criticism out there today on the topic, and people looking for an excuse to bitch about something are naturally placing DST right in their crosshairs. Rather than complaining about driving to work in the dark or pointing out the fact that DST has little to do with farming, it’s time we all embrace the greatness that is Daylight Saving Time.
First of all, what were you really going to do with that one hour of sleep you lost? You’re not allowed to cite your sleep schedule as a reason for, or against, something if you’re constantly shutting down bars and staying up until 1:30 a.m. on work nights binge-watching The Jinx. Aside: The Jinx is very well done, and I’m enjoying it thus far. Thanks to whoever made the recommendation. Back to the sleep thing. Stop scapegoating DST as the reason you rolled into work forty minutes late looking like hungover Vince Vaughn. That one hour meant nothing to you, and you know it.
Next, DST hits us right when we all start to care about hitting the course again, and there are few things better than hitting the range after work. Your clubs have probably been collecting dust in your garage for the last few months because 1) it’s been cold as fuck, and 2) you had no time to play on the weekend. Seriously, it’s difficult to devote an entire afternoon to golf when you have important matters to attend to, such as engagement parties, dinner, drinks, and dinner and drinks. Now that you’ve got that extra daylight to knock the rust off your game, there are no more excuses for your embarrassingly inconsistent short game. At a minimum, you should be getting a quick nine in after work.
Finally, DST will undoubtedly boost the overall quality of happy hour, and pardon me for saying it, but I think that is a good thing. Be honest with yourself — you feel way more justified throwing down house margs if the sun is still out. Okay, you’ll still probably be just as beaten down as you were before the time change as you’re circling the bar desperately looking for a place to park your ’05 Hyundai, but at least you can see the fucking sun (weather permitting).
Trust me on this. It gets better. You may feel like shit for most of today, or maybe most of the week, but DST will work itself out. So go ahead and bitch about driving into work in the dark, and curse the bastards who thought of DST for making you a little bit tired on a Monday morning, but when it’s 7:40 on a Thursday and you’re rocking shades and a Hawaiian on a patio, remember to thank DST..
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