Columns

I Hate Your Tattoo

I Hate Your Tattoo

Call me old-fashioned, but I’ve never really understood the widespread tattoo fad, and over time, it’s gotten worse and worse. In previous generations, the majority of American tattoos were reserved for military veterans commemorating their combat tours, gang members, artists, or, in more recent history, musicians like rappers and rock stars. Military tattoos especially were a classic piece of Americana, but now everyone and their mother (sometimes literally their mother) has a tattoo. Tattoos used to mean something.

War veteran, rebel, tough guy, outcast, or artist. It was reserved for the select few who were willing to weather that stigma. Now shrimpy lumber-sexual hipsters have sleeve tattoos to offset their black skinny ties and angsty teens and twenty-somethings have inspirational quotes on them. It’s a damn disgrace.

Once tattoos started getting trendy and every gym rat in America got a barbed wire tattoo on his bicep, women started getting in on the action. The most infamous female tattoos were tramp stamps, but now they’ve expanded to the little cursive tattoos on the wrist, ribcage, or foot. Maybe a small shoulder blade tattoo or a hibiscus tattoo on the hip. Don’t forget the tiny, subtle ankle tattoos, almost like they don’t want you to know they have a tattoo unless you’ve examined their entire body.

And let’s not forget the tattoo weirdos who went so far down the rabbit hole that they had their entire body tattooed to look like a freaking leopard or they have tattoos in ridiculous x-rated regions. Why? Why on Earth would you do that to your body?

The tattoo fad ruins the whole meaning of the tattoo. The combat veterans, the artists, the musicians, and the criminals have an understandable reason to have a few tattoos. As far as the latter goes, I like being able to identify who I need to keep an eye on while walking around downtown. Anyway, these individuals’ tattoos don’t mean anything anymore when tattoos become mainstream because it’s “cool” and “edgy.”

Also, have you ever seen a tattoo that enhanced someone’s appearance? Ever? I can’t think of one. Ladies, do you really think your “Live, Laugh, Love” shoulder blade tattoo improves your appearance? Your wrist tattoo? Your ankle tattoo? It’s body graffiti, and as you get older it’ll look less like cursive and more like comic sans, and the tattoos look trashier. Even worse, tramp stamps and the hip hibiscus? Get out of here. And guys, your tribal band bicep tattoo makes you look like a try hard and sleeve tattoos make you look like a douche bag.

Tattoos seem cool when you are younger, and I get that. Especially if you’re hammered. The young and stupid want to look cool and edgy. However, everyone I know who got a tattoo when they were younger is getting it removed. Their reason? “I was young and stupid when I got this.” Cut it out with the douchey tattoos and stop putting graffiti on your body.

Email this to a friend

5OClockShadow

"Technically, Pablo Escobar was in sales."

28 Comments You must log in to comment, or create an account

Show Comments

For More Photos and Content

Latest podcasts

Download Our App

Take PGP with you. Get

New Stories

Load More