On this week’s ep of the
The Guy Who’s Been In A Relationship Since Before Dating Apps
And yet he still hasn’t put a ring on it. What a catch.
The Girl Who’s A Podcast Host that Needs to Remain Anonymous So She Doesn’t Lose Her Job
Her job frowns upon her writing dick jokes and discussing masturbation on the side.
The Guy Who Married Young And Who Doesn’t Understand Bumble
Just seeing what’s out there. Just checkin’ it out.
The Girl Who Once Went Semi-Viral With Her Tinder Description And Now Refuses To Ever Change It
Once you go (sort of) viral, you never go back.
The Guy Who Has Been Described As A Project By Multiple Women
He’s kind of like that room you keep saying you want to paint, but never actually do.
The Girl Who Might Sleep With You But Probably Won’t Date You
She definitely won’t date you if her dogs aren’t into you.
The Guy Who’s Clearly Cheating On His Girlfriend
Ignore the fact that he’s clearly cropped his girlfriend out of his pics.
The Girl Whose Only Here for The Self-Confidence Boost
She’s not going to message you back, but thanks for the match.
The Guy Who’s Just Clearly Had It
Looks good on paper.
The Guy Who Has A Dog
He’s a blogger.
The Guy Who’s A Single Dad With No Free Time
I think we all know that I would totes swipe right here.
If you’re a listener, you know that we give each of the Bumble profiles submitted a letter grade – and now it’s your turn. How did we do? Give us a letter grade in the comments. And given there’s not a brunch, wine, or bean picture in sight, we better score well.