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Hey Ladies, You Should Move To These Cities If You’re Looking For A Sugar Daddy

Hey Ladies, You Should Move To These Cities If You're Looking For A Sugar Daddy

Everyone knows that I’ve been looking to become a stay at home dad for some time now, so being considered a “sugar daddy” is pretty much out of the realm of possibility for me. I mean, on average, the sugar daddies in Orlando spent over $3,400 alone per month on their sugar babies. Just last night, I hesitated on spending the extra dollar to get bleu cheese on my burger at TopGolf.

Sure, I put out a luxurious vibe lifestyle, but I’m nowhere near becoming someone’s sugar daddy. That being said, per The Orlando Sentinel, you should probably move to one of these cities if you’re looking for a full-time gig of being someone’s sugar baby:

10. San Francisco: 14.21 sugar daddies per 1,000 men
9. Chicago: 14.53 sugar daddies per 1,000 men
8. Tampa: 14.59 sugar daddies per 1,000 men
7. Vancouver: 15.36 sugar daddies per 1,000 men
6. Dallas: 16.83 sugar daddies per 1,000 men
5. Orlando: 18.1 sugar daddies per 1,000 men
4. Boston: 18.25 sugar daddies per 1,000 men
3. Las Vegas: 19.23 sugar daddies per 1,000 men
2. Atlanta: 21.60 sugar daddies per 1,000 men
1. Austin: 23.24 sugar daddies per 1,000 men

Okay, I’ve been living for about half-of-a-year in Austin now and this has flown completely under my radar. If there are so many sugar daddies here, then why do I constantly see my friends spending money on drinks for blondestars when we’re out? If they’re already on a $3k/month allowance from these rich, horny pervs, then why are all my friends going broke trying to have a one-night stand? Makes no sense to me.

If anything, I want to start hanging out with these sugar babies more often. No, not to hook up with them. I just want to get the overflow residuals and perks that come along with it. Monica is taking out some old dude’s Porsche for the day? I’m in. Sarah is chilling atop the W Hotel during F1 weekend? My drinks will be on her tab too. Beth backstage at ACL drinking champagne with Drake? Yeah, you’ll find me in those Instagrams.

Live for excess, guys. It’s the American way.

[via Orlando Sentinel]

Image via YouTube

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Will deFries

Will deFries (@WilldeFries) is the world's foremost authority on Sunday Scaries. Writer, Editor, and Content Manager at Post Grad Problems. Email me at will@grandex.co.

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