I’ve been on dating apps for a long time, so I’ve seen a lot of infractions in my day. Beaten to death are the selfies: gym selfies, mirror selfies, car selfies, the selfie where the guy lifts up his shirt and tries to flex while forcing a normal-looking face. But you know what hasn’t gotten much attention until now? Fish holding pictures. I once saw a guy on Tinder with all six of his photos holding different fish. I swiped right out of sheer amazement. Other than that, I’ve always viewed fish holding pictures in the way I imagine guys view my “candid” brunch mimosa picture. To say “I’m basic but in the normal way, not in an obnoxious way.” Neither are meant to be the ultimate influence on the swiping decision.
But apparently I’m just flat out wrong. A recent study polled 1,000 sorority women in Florida and found nearly 50% of them were more attracted to guys who had a photo holding a fish than those who did not have any such photo. Now, I know that sample population isn’t the most diverse, but for dudes trying to get laid, I think that’s probably a good place to start. We have all seen what sorority girls look like in Florida.
Don’t rejoice too early, though – turns out the species of fish makes a difference: “Nearly 25 percent of women said the Great Northern Tilefish made the dude smiling next to it look the most attractive, followed by the Sailfish. ‘Lean, powerful, and independent, it could be interpreted that a Sailfish in a man’s dating profile hints at athleticism, finess [sic], and free-spiritedness,’”
If I’m being completely honest, I have never paid attention to the type of fish a guy is holding in his photo. I am looking for two things: 1) Does he have a passable dad bod? 2) Is the boat clearly a rental or is there a chance he owns it? A guy could pose with a Subway sandwich on a boat and I probably wouldn’t even notice. That said, I am not the scientist here.
“Women weren’t into pics with juvenile carp (less than one percent of them said it was hot). Maybe it’s due to its teeny size (juvenile carp only grow up to six inches) or maybe women just really hate carp—for whatever reason, it’s probably best not to go there.”
So the bad news is it looks like you kind of have to know what you’re doing. Can’t be showing up with some dinky ass juvenile carp and expect to start hitting home runs out the gate. The good news: buy a nature handbook or get really good at Photoshop, and you have a shot.
Now, it should be addressed that this study was done A) by a fishing company (go figure) and B) in Florida, where they love their fishing like they love committing weird crimes. That doesn’t necessarily discount its findings, but keep in mind it probably has not been peer-reviewed within the scientific community. With all studies, use discretion when applying it to your life. We don’t need any more irresponsible dating app behavior out there than there already is. .
[via Women’s Health]
Image via Shutterstock