FRIDAY DIMEBAG: Is It Okay To Take Advantage Of My Rich Friends?

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Alright, hold me to it. The PGP Mailbag is now officially a Friday feature and it’s called the Dimebag, because that’s about as much drugs you can afford each weekend. If you’ve got any questions, and I mean any questions, feel free to email me at brian@grandex.co (NOT dot com).

Let’s do it.

Dr. Bri Guy,

I have a really good friend from college who makes a lot of money. He’s the definition of “killing it.” Bought a brand new Grand Cherokee SRT (cash), has an awesome downtown condo (rented), has tech gadgets coming out of his ass and he’s got one of those awesome curved Samsung 4K TVs. My friends and I think he has to be hauling in well over $100k/year AFTER taxes. Said friend also drunkenly told me that he does in fact make over $100 grand a year after taxes. He’s 24 and works for a pharmaceutical sales company. I have no idea how he’s pulling it off, but he’s really doing it. We’ve told him before that we think he’s spending too much money, but he’s always brushed it off, confidently telling us that he really can afford all of this stuff. I believe it, but everyone else isn’t so sure. To “prove it,” he’s offered to take all of us (four total) on an all expenses paid trip to Beaver Creek in February. Flights, hotel, food, booze, fucking everything.

So here’s my dilemma: is this okay? Is it okay to take advantage of my rich friends? I would kill for a vacation right now and really could use some time off. Also, can my friend actually afford footing the bill for a vacation that is probably going to run him at least five grand just to prove a point?

Jake

Your friend is an asshole. No doubt about it. A generous asshole, but still an asshole. Who the hell talks about money like that? You and your friends shouldn’t be worried about whether or not this guy is making as much money as he says he is. You really should be worried about his absurd spending habits. $100 grand sounds like a nice number, but the reality is that it’s not THAT much money in the grand scheme of things. I’m not turning my nose up at that kind of quiche, but let’s be realistic: It’s not “fuck you” money, which is what your friend is talking about spending on a trip with you and your buddies. We joke about power moves here, but dropping five percent of your annual take-home pay on a boozy weekend with your friends in Colorado isn’t one. That’s just flat out stupid.

Now, if your friend was hauling in something like 200, 300 grand in liquid every year, then he might be able to get away with this. I have no idea how he’s affording the kind of overhead you talked about as it is. I doubt he paid for that Jeep in cash and he’s probably financing it. That thing retails at $64,000, so even if he IS making six figures, he STILL couldn’t afford that kind of car.

My advice to you is don’t take the trip. It sounds like your friend is full of shit. More accurately, your friend is more than likely a credit card millionaire. At 24, even with a full two years of experience as a pharma rep, I doubt he’s making much more than the average salary for someone in that field (~$110,000 a year). It’s an impressive haul, yeah, but the fact that your boy claims he’s bringing in six figures AFTER taxes is a bit fishy. I’m not doubting it, there are some wunderkinds out there who hit the jackpot early on in life, but the fact that he’s flexing this much muscle so early in the game leads me to believe that he’s full of shit and most definitely not rolling in it as much as he says he is. He probably got a few big paychecks and started getting AmEx offers in the mail, he applied for one with a huge limit and got it. That’s my only explanation.

Regardless, thank him for the offer and tell him that you will pay your own way (if you can afford it) if he still wants to go. There’s nothing wrong with letting him pick up the check at happy hour every once in a while, but it’s way too early to let this guy foot the bill for a luxurious ski brocation.

BONUS email:

Brian,

I don’t really have any problems that need addressing in a public forum to a ton of people, so I figured I’d ask you what your favorite video games of all time are.

Cheers,

Ryan

This is one of my favorite questions to ask someone once I get to know them, so fuck you for not getting to know me better first before asking such a personal question.

But really, I love talking video games. I’m not exactly a nerd, but I had no problem as a child, teenager (or frankly, as an adult) wasting an entire weekend in front of a television playing video games. It’s my addiction. I have a mental list of games that I could play over and over and over again and never get bored of them.

In no particular order, or regard for length:

-Syphon Filter (PSX)
-Madden 2004 (PS2)
-Assassin’s Creed II (360)
-Age of Empires II (PC)
-NHL 95 (Sega)
-NHL 98 (PC)
-NHL 10 (360)
-Halo 2 (Xbox)
-Fallout: New Vegas (360)
-Gran Turismo 2 (PSX)
-Goldeneye 64 (N64)
-Far Cry 3 (360)
-MarioKart 64 (N64)
-The Sims (PC)
-Sim City 4 (PC)
-Roller Coaster Tycoon (PC)
-Red Dead Redemption (360)
-Gun (Xbox)
-Skyrim (360)

Alright, so maybe I am a huge gamer nerd. SO WHAT.

If you have a question you want answered, email me at brian@grandex.co (NOT dot com)

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