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Five People That Had A Worse Weekend Than You: Hilary Duff

Five People That Has A Worse Weekend Than You: Hilary Duff

Guys, I did a big thing this weekend. My TV was flipping out, with the volume going up and down and the menu flashing on and off. But instead of calling my tech-savvy nephew to fix it, I googled the issue, took apart my TV, and fixed the problem all by myself… and I only broke off one little piece. So I’m riding my high of managing to fix a technology issue all by myself and probably feeling better than these people after the crap weekend they had.

Pokémon Festival Attendees

Honestly, if you were actually spending a weekend at a Pokémon festival, I feel bad enough for you to begin with. But for the attendees at this weekend’s first-ever Pokémon Go festival in Chicago, things went from bad to worse when many of those who traveled in to the event weren’t able to log into the app.

Tickets for the event went on sale in June and sold out within minutes, with as many as 20,000 Pokémon players descending upon Chicago’s Grant Park on the one year anniversary of the app’s release. However, when players weren’t able to go to Pokémon hunting, Niantic, which developed the game, were forced to issue everyone a full refund for the tickets and $100 in credits for use as well as the capture of the Legendary Pokémon Lugia, “a rare and powerful creature difficult to defeat in virtual battle and prized by Pokémon enthusiasts,” according to The Daily Mail.

I literally don’t know what that means, but I’ve got to figure it’s not much comfort to the people traveled from places like Australia, Denmark, France, Panama, Paraguay, Portugal and Singapore for the festival. Then again, I don’t really get people that would travel from that far away to play a video game, so what do I know? [via Daily Mail]

People In This Brooklyn Park

Apparently, parks weren’t great places for a lot of people this weekend.

Five people have been bitten in Brooklyn’s Prospect Park by an “unusually aggressive squirrel,” according to the city’s Health Department, who believe that the rodent is rabid.

Four of the five people who were victims of the hungry critter have been identified and treated; city officials are still looking for the last one so he/she can get treatment.

Guess my mom was right when she told me not the pet the squirrels. [via New York Daily News]

Hilary Duff

Another thing my mom was right about: not posting pictures online letting people know that I’m on vacation because someone will know that I’m not home and break into my house. Apparently, Hilary Duff’s mom didn’t give her the same advice.

Duff has been posting pictures of his family vacation in Canada over the last few days like this one:

A post shared by Hilary Duff (@hilaryduff) on

So thieves knew that she was not at her Beverly Hills home and took advantage, breaking into the house knowing she wasn’t there and making off with a bunch of high-end jewelry.

Shit, does this mean that my mom was right about everything? [via TMZ]

“Fellony”

What’s in a name? Well, a lot for one guy in Oregon.

22-year-old Fellony Hudson was charged with felony kidnapping, felony eluding, and felony possession of a stolen vehicle (plus a bunch of misdemeanor charges) after witnesses in Vancouver, WA reported seeing a woman being assaulted in a stolen vehicle being driven by Hudson. Police gave chase and Hudson led them across state lines before eventually being stopped with spike strips in Gresham, OR.

I guess if your parents name you “Fellony,” it’s pretty inevitable that you’d ultimately wind up leading a life of crime, right? I’m thinking I’m going to name my future children Billionaire, Success and Takes Care Of His Momma. [via NBC4i]

Henry Romero and Darwin Ceren

I admittedly don’t know much about soccer, but I’m relatively sure that biting isn’t allowed, right? I mean, does any sport allow you to pull a Mike Tyson and take a chomp at a competitor?

Romero and Ceren, players on El Salvador’s national team, apparently forgot this rule during their quarterfinal game in the Gold Cup against the U.S. According to ESPN, “Romero bit U.S. striker Jozy Altidore on the back of his shoulder and twisted his nipple before Cerin bit U.S. defender Omar Gonzalez.”

The Confederation of North, Central American and Caribbean Association Football (CONCACAF) decided to suspend Romero for six games and Ceren for three. Since the suspensions affect only “official matches and El Salvador has already been eliminated from 2018 World Cup qualifying, the players are likely to miss the next Copa Centroamericana or qualifiers for the 2022 World Cup when they begin in 2019.

That seems like a fair consequence for a purple nurple. [via ESPN]

Image via Instagram

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Jenna Crowley

Jenna used to be known as 2NOTBrokeGirls, but then one of the girls actually went broke, so she's struck out on her own. Jenna spends her free time saving the world, one sorority girl at a time (usually while wearing yoga pants), questioning why she decided to get a doctorate, documenting her love of all things cheese related, and hosting the new PGP podcast Don't Take It From Us. You can ask her anything you want about football, using your boobs to get what you want, and pizza at @JennaLCrowley on Twitter or via email at JennaLCrowley@gmail.com.

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