Just got my girlfriend pregnant. PGP.
Threw out my lower back playing corn hole at a brewery this weekend. PGP.
Now that I’m in law school I actually miss my college finals. PGP.
Cuffing Season. PGP.
May the 4th be with you. PGP.
I just got notice I’m getting transferred to Tulsa. PGP.
I’ve been at this job site for almost six weeks. Only have two friends. PGP.
Asking “Who do you know here?” at a party. TFM.
Asking “Who do you know here?” at a networking event. PGP.
Taking suggestions for a new Bumble opener. PGP.
My city is going absolutely batshit over the Cubs. I’m a Twins fan. PGP.
Fuck it. I’m getting wine tonight. PGP.
Threesome happened, and it consists of my coworker and her boyfriend. PGP.
Just got promoted and relocated to a new office- 400 miles away. PGP.
Accepted a job offer this morning and already my productivity at my current job has plummeted. Haven’t even given notice yet. PGP.
My boss isn’t letting us leave early for voting day. PGP.
May have to give up coffee because of the Acid Reflux. PGP.
Girlfriend cheated. It was with the bartender at my go-to spot. PGP.
Trump just won my home state. PGP.
My younger brother’s pilot just got picked up by HBO. I’m taking the bus to my cubicle. PGP.
Still don’t know what GOAT means. PGP.