“Bring Your Own Slurpee Cup Day” At 7-Eleven Is Gonna Cause Riots

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"Bring Your Own Slurpee Cup Day" At 7-Eleven Is Gonna Cause Riots
There are very few more satisfying things on a hot, summer day than a massive Slurpee the size of your head from your local 7-Eleven. They’re dirt cheap, ice cold, and…uhh, something about your mother being like a 7-Eleven. I forget the joke. It’ll come back to me.

Anyway, 7-Eleven wants you to forget all about that cold, harsh, hellish winter we survived and come jumpstart summer with a cup full of Slurpee. However, not just a standard, plastic Slurpee cup. Oh no, my friends. You can bring ANY cup your little heart desires. That’s right — This Saturday, April 11 – from 11 a.m. to 7 p.m. local time – is “Bring Your Own Cup Day.” You can fill up ANY cup you bring in for the price of $1.49, the price of a 22-oz Slurpee.

7-Eleven is calling it their “summer kickoff,” according to Laura Gordon, vice president of marketing and brand innovation at 7-Eleven. Off-topic, if she’s the person that brought us Loaded Doritos, I want to marry her. Clearly, they’re hoping you come for the Slurpees and stay for the hot dogs.

OH NOW I REMEMBER THE JOKE – Your momma’s like a 7-Eleven: 24-hours, always hot to go, and for $1.49, she’ll give you a Slurpee. Ahh, nobody gives a shit. Moving on.

There’s a catch to this deal: You can’t bring in any cup larger than 10 inches in diameter, so nothing the size of a garbage can. You also can’t fill it into a shoe, or boot, or anything unsanitary, or something porous like a baseball hat. But think about the possibilities…you can fill up something the size of a gallon. You got a favorite trophy? Fill it to the fucking brim and dump it over your head with glory. Put it in a bucket, fill the other half with booze, and just chill outside with a bunch of straws and some good times. The possibilities are endless.

It’s gonna be bedlam. Get there early.

[via NBC News Colorado]

Image via Shutterstock

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