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Animals At Oregon Zoo Having Significantly Better Day Than You

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The Oregon Zoo got a boatload of unexpected snow, so they closed for a snow day, and holy shit are the animals living it up.

Check out Mr. Polar Bear rolling around in that fresh powder. He’s happier than you’ve ever been in your entire life. Look at his face. You can almost hear him thinking, “This fucking ruleeees my life is dooooope.” Can you think of anything that would bring you that much joy? You can’t. Pathetic. And you seen’t that elephant trotting along and cheesing his dick off? He just attained omnipresent supergalactic oneness. Be jealous as hell.

Is there anything cuter than a little otter scooting along in the snow just living the dream? I’ll tell you. There isn’t.

I might start smoking weed and become a zoologist.

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Ross Bolen

Ross Bolen is a New York Times Bestselling author, co-host of the Oysters, Clams & Cockles podcast, co-host of the Back Door Cover podcast, psychotic Rockets fan, fair-weather Astros fan, and sad Texans fan.

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