I think the first question we have to ask here is “why in the hell does anyone think this is a good idea?” I’m not privy to the fashion trends around the world, but I can’t imagine there’s a high demand for 22-inch pipe jeans to make a comeback anywhere outside of the Gathering of the Juggalos or a time machine back to 1998.
But here we are. Chinese company Guotai Litian has agreed to give money to someone to re-release these monsters back into the consumer public.
Spearheaded by Andrew Jacovou, recently named president and chief executive officer of Los Angeles-based Guotai Litian, and managing director of marketing and former JNCO employee Steven Sternberg, the inaugural fall offering will include three distinct capsules. The core collection, a fashion collection and a heritage range, which will feature jeans with leg openings of 20 and 23 inches. Jacovou said JNCO “will appeal to trendsetting men and women who wore the brand in the Nineties, as well as a new generation of consumers who will be introduced to the brand’s fashion-forward sensibilities for the first time.”
I’m all for getting rid of the skinny jean trend that’s plagued the world in this decade, but at what cost? Apparently this is the cost. I’m not going to sit here and lie to you. I definitely tried to talk my mom into buying me a pair of Lee Pipes at one point back in the day, but that was when I went through a bit of a skater boy fashion phase in the late ’90s. I spent an entire summer playing Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater and trying to learn how to ollie. I won’t apologize for that.
Is this really a trend we want to bring back? I know fashion is cyclical, but dammit. In the wise words of Jeff Goldblum as Dr. Ian Malcolm in Jurassic Park, “your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could that they didn’t stop to think if they should.”
JNCO jeans had their shot and fashion and sanity selected them for extinction. They should’ve been buried in that Indiana Jones warehouse at the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark to be forgotten forever. This will not end well for anyone..
Image via Youtube