28 Stages Of Drinking Alone

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1. First sip.

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2. More. I need more.

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3. I’m just so happy right now.

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4. I deserve another glass. I’m awesome.

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5. Yep. Just fill her up nice and good.

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6. Actually, you know what? May as well just skip straight to the bottle.

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7. Is it bad that I’m drinking alone?

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8. Fuck it.

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9. Whoa. Empty bottle.

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10. Guess I’ll just have to open another one.

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11. I wonder what’s on Bravo right now.

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12. Stop texting me, Mom. I’m busy being an adult.

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13. More wine!!!!!

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14. I feel so good about my life right now.

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15. I love drinking.

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16. DRUNK SNAPCHATTING IS MY FAVORITE.

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17. I wonder if I have any vodka.

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18. Come to mama.

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19. I wonder what my ex-boyfriend is up to.

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20. His phone is probably on silent. I’ll just keep calling until he answers.

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21. I miss him.

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22. I wonder if I’ll remember this tomorrow.

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23. I need food…

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24. …and more vodka.

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25. Taylor Swift just gets me.

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26. I’m just gonna close my eyes for a second.

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27. Aaaaaaand I’m out.

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28. Tomorrow morning: Regret City.

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Catie Warren

Catie struggles with adulthood and has been celebrating her 21st birthday for the past three years. She attended college in the nation’s capital and to this day is angry that Pit Bull lied to her, as you cannot, in fact, party on The White House lawn. Prior to her success with PGP, Catie was most famous for being featured in her hometown newspaper regarding her 5th grade Science Fair Project for which she did not place. In her spare time, she enjoys attributing famous historical quotes to Marilyn Monroe and getting in fights with thirteen year olds on twitter. Find her on Total Sorority Move as "From Rush to Rehab." Email: catie@grandex.co

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